~~ CHAPTER FORTY-TWO ~~

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The road led us back to where they first found Dan and Phil, the place they had been by chance just at the right moment to become a huge part of our lives. The last time that we were sat here was different though because we were here with Wade.

Every one of us had lost so, so much over the last few years, so much more than we could have ever dreamt of losing in our worst nightmares, but after hearing what Dan had said, I was afraid, I was afraid that I was going to lose more. There was just this un shakeable feeling deep down that something wasn't right, that something would go wrong and that nothing would be okay. I know Dan said to look after them, but I have no idea how I'm going to do that, especially if something does happen.

We drove right past the campsite of a few days ago and straight through towards the town that had once been full of dead, packed to the brim. The place I'd found the strength to stay with my family, and the place I'd lost the only one I'd been able to call family before finding them.

I still missed her, I missed her so much, words can't even describe. I would have done anything to save her, and obviously, she would do anything to save me. She was beautiful, amazing, the one person I was able to count on in a world full of nothing until Mark had found me. If I had to choose now though, between her and Mark, I wouldn't be able to choose her, because I have let myself fall in love with that man all over again, and I don't think she could ever hate me for that. I don't think she'd even recognise me anymore, because I barely do. I'm not the same person I was when I was with her, I've changed.

Before we left the bunker, I let myself gaze through my own eyes in the mirror one last time, and although I couldn't find the innocence I lost, I found something much stronger, I found someone much stronger. I found myself and the will to carry on for the people I love because if I didn't have them I would have no one at all. I wouldn't want anyone else.

I guess I just wish that Dan and Phil could still be here with us, but I think they'll be okay. They're strong and deserve the world. They deserve a world where everything would be okay, and a world where there was no disease or loss or loath, I just wish they could have that... I really do.

The minutes turned to hours as we finally pulled up on the other side of the bridge, the one I'd jumped off to avoid being eaten, the one I dove off to save the men sitting in the back half asleep and ready to just call it a day.

Up ahead I could see something though... It was the dead, they were back, and I don't know how, but there were more of them now, more of them than before. It's like they all congregate to this one are, and I had no idea why.

"Guys?" I called into the back, waking the sleeping Mark sitting in the passenger seat across from me. The other two moved up to get a better look at what I was asking them to look at.

"Oh... My... God..."

"We've gotta get through there.."

"Is there any way around?"

"In this? No... The only way through is, well, though."

"It can't be done, we'd never make it."

"We have to try."

I revved the engine and placed my foot firmly on the accelerator, readying the truck to plough its way through the group of walking, rotting skin and bone.

"You guys might wanna hold onto something..."

The boys grabbed whatever was nearest as I threw off the hand break and the truck spun out before kicking forwards and heading full speed for the hoard. At first I was certain that we would make it, until the nerves kicked in and I began to doubt the entire plan. The truck hurtled forwards and as we entered the town, began to push its way through the dead. Everything was going smoothly until I swerved a little out of instinct trying to miss a light pole and smashing into the store I had been taking refuge in before leaving Mark here on his own.

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