my name is aaron (ftm)

18

John switched schools.
He left quietly and wordlessly.
People whisper about it, but none of them mention me.
Good. I don't need any more attention.

I had looked into a few of those websites from the paper the school nurse gave me a while ago. It turns out that the term for what I am is an FtM transgender. FtM, meaning, female to male. It made me smile, finally able to know exactly what I am, instead of just feeling wrong and confused.
I was able to meet another FtM trans guy named Jordyn on one of the websites. We talked a lot online and it was fun. We made jokes about being trans and just jokes in general. We also ranted a lot to each other about our condition, and it was good to know that someone understood what I was going through. Jordyn also gave me a ton of tips, like exercises to make my voice sound deeper and to use a sports bra if I couldn't get a binder.
Jordyn is cool. He's 17, plays on the boy's soccer team at school and he works at a fast food place. He's out to his parents and they support him fully. I'm partially jealous of that but also happy for him. He has a girlfriend named Clara who is MtF transgender. I think that's awesome.
I rant to him about my parents and how they aren't really accepting me yet.

It sucks. I thought it would be enough to at least get them to think about it, but they're being so stubborn.
[Don't worry. They just need some time. It's a big shock for them, Y'know.]
I know, I know, but I guess I either expected them to accept me or reject me. They're kind of in between and it's confusing, I hate it.
[It's not always gonna be easy... Trust me, I wish it was.]
Yeah. How's Clara been doing?
[It's a lot better now. When her parents first kicked her out of the house, she was terrified, but now she's living with me and we're both a lot happier.]
Aw that's so cute :)
[Hah, yeah it's great cuz now I never miss her. She's always with me.]

I sigh and think about Screw.
Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if he stayed.

That's great man, I'm happy for you both.
[Thanks, Aaron. I gotta go, but I'll talk to you tomorrow, yeah?]
You know it. See ya.

I close my laptop and sigh heavily.
There's a lot on my mind.
Mom and dad have been kind of avoiding me lately. I don't know if it's the whole trans thing or if they're just being weird. I don't think about it too much.
At least things at school have been a bit calmer without the threat of John looming around. I'm no longer scared every time I turn a corner.
And most importantly...
School is almost over.

And I'm turning 14 tomorrow.

My birthday is on the weekend.
I wake up late and make my way downstairs. Mom, dad, and Sheryl are sitting on the couch in the living room. Their gazes are all locked me.
"What are you-" I start to say.
"Sit down, honey." Mom says calmly.
It's pretty spooky.
I sit down across from them in the sofa. There's a small gift-wrapped box on the table between us about the size of shape of a textbook.
Uhm...
"Open it." Sheryl says, a small smile forming on her face.
I look at them skeptically as I pick up the box.
As I begin to tear off the wrapping paper, dad starts talking.
"We just wanted to help you celebrate your birthday today, by saying..."
"We're ready." Mom finishes.
I raise my eyebrows at them in confusion as I tear off the rest of the paper.
I open the box and I nearly drop it.
"We've all thought about it, and we've decided." Mom says.
I want to cry.
It's a binder.
"Oh my god..." I whisper.
"Happy birthday, Aaron."
I'm at a complete loss for words. I open and close my mouth repeatedly and I probably look like a fish or an idiot. Or both.
"Holy crap. Holy crap." I say, my voice cracking.
Is this real?
The three of them come over to me and crush me in a huge hug. All I can do is say "thank you thank you thank you" over and over again and I hug them back and cry like a happy idiot.