((Author's note)) Okay I'm doing this beforehand to let you all know that this imagine will be emotionally heavy. There will be talk of self harm and suicide. Please, I beg you, please do not read this if you are currently going through this or if this will trigger you in anyway. Remember you're not alone, I love all of you, and I am one message away.
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Ariana had decided this was it. This was her final curtain call. After all she had fought for, and all she had been through, it came to this.
Ariana was sitting on her toilet, her tub filled with as much water as possible, and a bottle of pills in hand.
The pills were supposed to help. The doctor said they helped other people and could help her. But they didn't.
Ariana was still alone. Shaking as she cried, and still wished it was all over.
Nothing, no one, could help her. Not after she's seen. Not after what she had to do to survive.
The last person Ariana wished to speak to was Josh. He had been her only, and best, friend throughout everything. Josh saved her, in so many ways. More than he could ever imagine.
"Josh," Ariana's shaking voice spoke, "I- I know this is sudden, but you can't really predict these things right?" Ariana paused to cynically chuckle. In her case, everyone could see it coming.
"What I'm trying to say Josh," Ariana continued, still sniffing trying her best to pull it together," I love you. Thank you for trying and having patience with me. You- you're my best friend. I love you more than I love family, and even myself." Ariana sniffed once more.
"But this is the end." With that, she hung up. Not given Josh a single moment to speak.
Ariana sat for a moment. She reminisced about all the good times her and Josh had. She even reminisced about the bad. And as Ariana opened the bottle she cried harder.
What was on the other side? Was it heaven or hell? More importantly, did either side have Josh?
This is the point of no return. Do it. The voice in Ariana's mind said. She didn't recognize it. Frankly, when she looked in the mirror, Ariana didn't recognize herself.
The cap popped open and the pills shook around. Ariana grazed her hand over the water she was about to lay her body in for the last time. It had gotten a bit cold. How long have I been sitting here? She thought.
Outside the bathroom was the sound of a door opening and closing.
"Ariana?!" A voice shouted. It was Josh.
"Ariana please tell me you're here!" He shouted again.
Adrenaline pumped through her body. Ariana dumped out as many pills as possible and threw them into her mouth.
Swallow, swallow, swallow. She told herself. But everytime she tried, the pills wouldn't go down.
The door swung open, and Josh was there. He was out of breath and sweating. The lose hair from his beanie clung to his forehead. His eyes brimmed with tears and filled with pain.
Without words Josh ran to Ariana. He grabbed her and forced her mouth open. The pills rolled from her mouth, to the floor, and sobs came from Ariana's mouth.
"Josh. Why did you save me? Why? I can't do this anymore." Ariana was hysterical and it left Josh speechless.
He pulled her close, wrapping his arms as tightly around her as he could.
"Do you know what would happen to me if I lost you? I'd go insane." His voice was breaking.
Ariana continued to sob, wetting the many layers Josh was wearing.
"B-but I don't deserve to be here." Ariana gasped.
"Yes you do," Josh started, "you never hurt a soul a day in your life. It's the people that hurt you that don't deserve to be here." Josh tried to comfort her. There wasn't much he could do.
What would you do if someone you loved was in need and you couldn't help them?
"I see them everywhere Josh. They don't go away." Ariana wheezed into his chest. She was now holding on to him, as if he could disappear any second.
"Look at me," Josh leaned his head down to make eye contact with Ariana's puffy red eyes, "I'm here. I'm your brother and I'll always be here for you."
A year rolled down Josh's face as he looked at his best friend. How anyone could ever hate her, he didn't know. But what he did know is that from now on, he'll be the one to protect her.
Josh stood with Ariana still in his arm. He drained the water from her tub and gave her his jacket to put on.
"W-where are w-we going?" Ariana asked, her crying was replaced by a pounding headache.
"Home." Josh answered as he led her out of the bathroom, looking for the closest pair of shoes.
"I am home."
"Not anymore." Josh handed her a pair of shoes and led her to his car.
As Josh drove, neither of them said a word. There were no words to be said. Josh was saving Ariana once again.
Deep down, she was thankful. It was too much to admit right now. But soon Ariana will be thanking Josh an infinite amount of times for saving her.
I'm Josh's mind, Ariana didn't need to thank her. Ariana was unaware, but she had saved them too. Their friendship helped Josh trust that there are still good people in the world. Just good people with bad masks on.
Ariana was familiar with Josh's home. She spent more than half of her time here. Sometimes they would hang out, and other times Ariana would pick up one of the many books Josh had laying around. And she would listen to whatever record he would play in the other room.
A lot of times, Josh played on his own. He would strum on his guitar, and on a good day, bang away on his drum kit. It was the most peaceful chaotic place Ariana had ever been in.
That's where she stayed for upwards of a year. Ariana had, of course, gotten help while staying with Josh, but she found new ways to cope.
When her mind would wander to a dark place, she would pick up a guitar. Ariana might cook her and Josh a meal. Maybe even take her newly adopted puppy on a stroll around the neighborhood.
It wasn't easy. Not at all. Ariana still had a few set backs, as far as doing herself harm. But she worked her way up to a state of mind where she belonged.
Ariana was in a state of happiness.
As for Josh, he was just as great as Ariana was. Ariana, being the amazing friend she was, pushed him to better himself along with her.
He let loose a little more, found himself a girlfriend, and picked up painting.
Sometimes a friend is all someone needs. Friends are the family you get to choose and it's always best to choose wisely.
Ariana had made the best choice in Josh and he, obviously, felt the same way about her.
