Worse » daniel howell AU

10

I surely wasn't up to facing Dan the next day. I didn't feel like doing anything really, so when my alarm went off the next morning, I turned it off and rolled over to go back to sleep. Instead of going back to sleep, I ended up staring at the wall thoughtlessly.

When my phone dinged with a text message, I considered reaching over to see the message but opted to continue staring at the wall without any regard to much else.

My phone went off again not long afterward. I chose not to look at it once more as I really did not want to deal with anyone. It looked like that wasn't going to go to plan when a knock came from my door later.

"Aliah?" I heard my mother from the other side. I sighed quietly, knowing that I couldn't ignore her. "Yes?" I replied back just before the door opened. "Why aren't you at school, Ally?" She questioned. My back was turned away from her, and I did not bother to turn to look at her.

"Didn't feel like going," the words were mumbled out softly. "Aliah! You can't just skip school because you don't want to go!" She scolded, but I still refused to face her. "Mum, I've gone to school everyday this whole school year so far. I think I deserve this day," I reasoned, voice low from either sleep or lack of caring. I heard her sigh and footsteps toward the door again, "Just this once."

I heard the door shut soon after, and I closed my eyes, internally letting out a sigh of relief.

-

It had been a few hours, maybe two or three. I hadn't done much. I went to the bathroom, got some food, and went back to my bed. I finally looked at my phone as it had started dinging with messages again.

iMessage 5m ago
Phil 🦁
Are you okay?

iMessage 9m ago
Dan
We're worried about you.

iMessage 12m ago
Phil 🦁
Can you please message me back?

iMessage 20m ago
Phil 🦁
Why aren't you here?

iMessage 1h ago
Phil 🦁
Aliah

iMessage 1h ago
Phil 🦁
Are you showing up at all today?

iMessage 3h ago
Dan
Where are you?

iMessage 3h ago
Phil 🦁
Hey, where are you? Are you running late?

I was just about to sit my phone back down when I received another text message.

iMessage now
Dan
Is this because of me?

I hesitantly opened my phone, tapping on the iMessage icon. It opened onto my screen of messages and I clicked on Dan's name. I slowly typed one word.

Yes

I hit send and exited our message feed. I saw Phil's name on the list of messages, feeling guilty that I hadn't replied to him. I tapped on his name and again typed one word.

Yes

It was a lie. I felt like I needed to explain more to Phil, but I couldn't make myself. It seemed as if I was just completely emotionally exhausted. I put the phone down, lying back down on my bed.

-

I pulled myself out of bed later that day. Phil had texted me again, asking things about if I was really okay and saying that I could talk to him. I told him I was okay and then left my phone there on my bed as I went downstairs.

I was in the kitchen, looking through the pantry for something to snack on, or really to emotionally eat, when I heard the front door open. I furrowed my eyebrows as I looked at the clock on the wall. It wasn't time for either mum or dad to get home. I walked over to the kitchen door, peeking my head out to see who was at the door. I saw my older brother taking off his coat.

"Oh, it's you," I said causing him to look over at me. "Yes, it's me. Matthew Fray. Hello, stranger," he said as he walked over to the kitchen doorway. I moved back to the pantry as he walked into the kitchen. "Mum told me you were here, so I thought I would come over earlier than planned," he continued as he watched me rummaging through the pantry. I pulled out a large bag of crisps before I closed the pantry and turned to him.

"No offense, but you actually look like you've seen death," he raised an eyebrow at my appearance. "Well, thanks, Matt. Really appreciate that," I mumbled, opening the plastic bag in my hands. "Honestly, and I'm not just trying to be a horrible older brother here, but you look awful. Are you okay?" He moved a bit closer to me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's a stress day," I lied. He studied my face for a moment. "You've cried recently. What's going on?" He questioned. He's too observant. Also, his psychology minor probably wasn't helping my case.

"Matt, it really doesn't matter," I replied even though I knew that he would say that it did. After he graduated, he became a bit more protective of all of us. I wasn't sure why then, but after our younger brother's death, he became even more protective and way closer to all of us than he had ever been. He was the main person to help me get through that time.

"It does to me. You know if something's upsetting my Ally, it matters to me," he said, crossing his arms over his chest. I sighed, putting the bag of crisps down on the counter and moving toward him. He opened his arms, pulling me into a hug. I hugged back quickly after, wanting my older brother's comfort.

-

Matt knew the best ways to cheer me up. He had learned how to for both my sister and I. For my sister, Elizabeth, he would put on her favorite music and force her to dance with him which was hilarious to both be a part of and watch, so of course it would instantly cheer her up. He also would take her out for dinner if he could. Meanwhile, for me, he would order Chinese takeout and watch Netflix with me.

Matt was just about to call for Chinese takeout when there was a knock on the front door. He put his phone down on the coffee table, getting to his feet and walking out of the living room to answer the door.

A minute or so later, I heard Matt shout "Aliaaaaaah, there's a strange person named Phil here for you." I smiled weakly, standing up and going to the door. I saw Phil standing awkwardly at the door as I walked out of the living room. "Hey, Philly," I said as I got to the door, "this is my weird older brother, Matt."

"I'll take that," Matt said, about to leave when he looked back at Phil, "wanna stay for Chinese and Netflix? I can order you some."

"Uh, sure, yeah," Phil replied back softly before smiling. Matt nodded, walking off into the living room. I looked at Phil, moving to let him in and shutting the door behind him as he came in. "So, I actually came to talk to you about how you are doing... because you said you were okay, but you just didn't seem like it," Phil started to ramble.

"Yeah, I've been messed up all day. I can explain it. You deserve to know everything," I admitted. I took a moment to think of how to explain what happened. It was tough to explain.

"Lets go sit down. It's a long story."

A/N:
A long chapter so that you all could meet cutie pie Matt & learn more about her family.

I started writing this at 2:30 am and finished at 4:30 am. Wow.

Thanks for reading!
xx Megan