Blood: Story of a Psycho

Chapter Thirty-Four

I had to get her out of this. I had to get her away from me. I really didn't want to kill paul, but I had no choice. Jason kept drilling thoughts into my head. I couldn't stand it. Deep down I wanted to deny it but Jason kept pushing me into thinking about it.

He deserves it, Jason said. Just do it or else.

I knew what the "or else" was and I didn't like it, not one bit. I didn't want Jason to kill Christy so I had to get her away from me. I didn't have to wait too long.

"Why didn't you do something?"

"I don't know."

"I don't know either because usually you do something like beat him up, but you just stood there."

"Is that what you expect of me? Do you really expect me to beat up all of your problems?"

"That's not what I'm saying?"

"Well it sure as hell sounds like that's what you mean!"

"Please stop. I really don't want to fight right now."

We were near Christy's house. I stopped the car.

"Get out."

"What?"

"You heard me, we're at your house, get out."

"I don't see why you're getting so mad, it isn't my fault now is it?."

"It obviously isn't your fault, just get out, please."

"What's wrong then?"

"I can't explain it so if you could just go."

"Well maybe if you told me that was going on, I could help."

I slammed my hand on the steering wheel.

"Just stop! Okay?! There's nothing much you can do to help me with what I'm going through besides leaving right now!"

I tried to look and act angry. I was angry but just not at Christy, I was angry at myself. Every time I raised my voice at her made me more upset, to the brink of wanting to cry. Instead, as much as she sounded angry too, Christy did so for me.

"Fine, if that's how you feel right now, then I'll go."

Christy then got out of the car I drove off. As I drove, I thought about everything. Everything I've done for Christy and everything she's done for me. She puts herself through the constant taunting from these people for being with me because she actually wants to be with me. What I'm doing was sort of out of love, it was also out of some sort of sick vengeance but I allow it to happen. All because I didn't want to see her hurt or even killed by Jason, that's where the true love. I just wanted to break down and cry but Jason would just angry. Knowing that I wanted to cry told me one thing, I was human. I knew I was human because I knew I had a heart and I knew that I had heart because slowly mine was breaking. The only thing to stitch it up was my hatred, of Paul, of Jason and of myself. I just wanted to end this.