All my love

6%

"What time are you Meeting him?"

My hair being pulled into a tight pony tail, as Kelsey spoke through the speaker of the phone. She's excited that I'm meeting Conor today.

I never have time for guys anymore, my whole life is just modelling everything is about modelling.

Guys are never something that is on my mind as much. Yes I have fancied boys in the past. But I just don't have time to be like that towards a guy.

I've never had real feelings towards any guy. Worried in case I give them my time and my commitment and then suddenly I'm busy with modelling to even spend time with them.It's unfair and I couldn't do that to anyone. I always try and not get feelings for guys just to be safe

"Like in an hour. I'm pretty much ready I just need to brush my teeth and all" I say spraying hairspray in my hair

"Alright girly well I'll let you go get ready. I have a meeting anyway" she sighed

"Okay call later, mwah" I say making a kissing noise into the phone before ending it. Running of into the bathroom to brush my teeth.

I am excited for today, and also a little bit nervous. I'm not nervous about meeting Conor, just meeting a boy in general.

I haven't done that in so long so I am nervous. But I'll fight through that, put on my favourite act and get going.

London is super busy today. Cars driving past me at a speed I didn't even think was legal. Big Ben had just struck so I knew I was going to be late.

I sped walk All the way along the street until I found this random cafe Conor had suggested. The small bell rang as I pushed open the door

My eyes examining the busy room. Until I caught a pair of blue eyes and a wide smile. I knew those eyes well for only seeing them twice in my lifetime.

My feet automatically carried me over to the man sitting at the table, a smile on his face. I was greeted with a warm hug and a coffee my favourite things ever

"So how are you" he asked speaking up before I even go the chance to open my mouth. He seemed genuine when he asked the question not like most guys.maybe this one is different but how can I tell now?

"I'm fine thanks, yourself?" Okay let's try and just act like you're not nervous right now.

"Good yeah" well so far this is going great, we've been here for five minutes and already the conversation is flowing pretty well I'd say.

Maybe I'm just a charm.

I'm joking....that was a joke

"So, how has the Audio turned out for the video" I ask, I'm actually really excited to see it and how it turns out. I'm also excited to see the proper music video for it. I love the song a lot actually it's well written and well sung

I understand a lot of it.some of the background is just like mine. The lyrics really speak to me in some way that I can't describe. It's just put together in a good way

"It looks great so far actually, it will probably get sent you to next week if all goes well" he really sounded happy when he spoke, I wonder if I sound that happy or maybe he know I'm putting up an act

God why am I over thinking. I'm going to break down if I do not stop letting my thoughts run wild

Why am I like this? Why can't I just be normal and live a normal life with a dad.

"I'm very excited to see it" i say putting a smile on my face. Letting the other thoughts flow to the back of my brain not to think about

"So, wanna go for a walk by the Thames?" Conor asked, I nodded. I had finished my coffee like ten minutes ago anyway.