Porcupinegirl787@yahoo.com

24

Charlotte

"Honey, are you all ready for school?" I heard mom ask as her footsteps drew nearer to my bedroom door. I quickly wiped the tears from my cheeks and called back to her "yeah, I'm coming!" "Is something wrong?" She asked me upon hearing my voice crack and seeing my teary cheeks when she arrived. "No, nothing is wrong, mom. I'm fine." "Charlotte, you're crying." "I'm fine, mummy; I promise." "Charlotte," she warned sympathetically. "I just... I feel so bad about Cody. I really hurt him. But I just don't want to be in a relationship! And he thinks I dumped him for someone else..." "Oh, I'm sorry, dear. That's awful."

I walked through the halls, pretending to be my typical, bubbly self. I didn't want people to know that I'm depressed. "Good morning, Kye," I greeted with a grin. "Oh, hi, Charlotte," he smiled, putting away a journal. "What's that?" I questioned. "It's something personal," he said with a blush. "Are you keeping secrets from me?" I accused with a smirk. He offered a shy grin and blush, waiting until I sat at the cafeteria table to speak again.

"How are you doing? You know, with... Cody." "Well, you want me to be totally honest? I kind of... Um... I cried this morning. I feel awful. But I don't know what to do! He's been ignoring all of my calls and texts. He won't even look at me in class... And in the halls... In the halls, he just glares at me. He pierces my soul with his eyes like daggers. He hates me. But I love him! He's been my best friend for as long as I can remember. It was stupid of me to hurt him like I did, but I should never have asked him out in the first place. He was my best friend in the whole world. I was stupid to change that."

"Charlotte," Kye sighed with a frown, putting his arm around me to try to offer comfort, "I'm so sorry. I totally understand how you feel. A similar thing happened to me, once. It feels awful to lose a friend like this. Charlotte... I want to help you. I want to make you feel good. Even if it's only a distraction for as long as it lasts, please consider going out with me after school. We could do anything you want; I promise!" "That... That sounds great, Kye. I'd love to."

I was depressed throughout the entirety of my first class - the one before lunch with Cody in it. And Dean. Great... I nearly cried at my own thoughts. It was horrible. Dean looked concerned when I asked to go to the washroom with tears in my eyes, but he let me go without a word. I hid there the whole time. I knew I wouldn't be able to bear staying any longer. I was so glad he didn't mind. I just hoped he wouldn't try to talk to me about it...

I was at peace until lunch. Until I saw him again. I was surprised he sat with us. It was the first time in a little while. God only knows where he was, this last while... "Hi, Cody," I greeted quickly. He scoffed at me, his eyes flickering between me and Kye, who was seated on the other side of me. "Cody, can we please talk?" "I don't want to hear it, Charlotte," he sighed. "Cody, please. I swear I didn't leave you for him. I would never do that! Cody, you know me better than that." "I thought I did."

"Cody, I left you because I did want to lose you. You've been my best friend for so long. I didn't want to lose that. I was just going through the break-up and I brought you into it in a way I shouldn't have. I just want to be friends, again. I want things to be how they were. I want you to be my best friend again. Please..."

The only thing that made the fire in his eyes dissipate was the tears on my cheeks. "Charlotte," he sighed, putting his hand up as if he was considering comforting me. Kye put a hand on my knee, but I shooed him away. He was part of the reason I was crying. Because Cody thought it was his fault I had dumped him. But I had to convince him otherwise, and letting Kye touch me intimately was surely not going to work. "Cody, I'm sorry," I cried out. "I still love you as my friend and as my boyfriend. You mean everything to me. I promise. You've been by my side for everything I've had to go through, good and bad. Every single part. Why would I ever want to give that up?"