VanossGaming Crew One Shots

(Vanoss x Reader) Choices

--- Evan's P.O.V. ---

I scoffed to myself, flopping back down onto the bed. Of course, the day was gorgeous with the songs of robins and not a single storm cloud in sight. Everything looked extra green, as though the entire scenery was just a picture, and someone had edited it to look extra special.

What's the matter with me?

Yet here I lay, nothing but darkness and negativity clouding my mind. I had no reason to be this way. The day was beautiful, not a thing had gone wrong today, or the day before, or even the day before that. Very little mattered to me anymore. If someone were to crash into this house with a deadly weapon, I don't think I'd even move. If anything, I'd beg for the intruder to go ahead and end my life. Cause what's the point anymore?

We go through life with such hope, with dreams bigger than the Earth itself. We smile, we laugh, we cry. But what does that all really mean, where do those big dreams get us? We could be the richest of the rich, have everything we want, work ourselves to the bone to achieve that goal, that huge dream. Guess how we get rewarded in the end; death.

Everything we work so hard for, everything and everyone we held most dear, snatched away from us by the unmercifully claws of the Grim Reaper. It doesn't matter if you're Bill Gates or that drunken bastard on the side of the road, begging for a scrap of change to go and buy more booze. We all die, and everything we worked for is forever lost to us.

God, you're so selfish and self centered.

What's the meaning of life? To live and then die in the end. Forgive my rather pessimistic sounding response, but isn't it true? This vast universe we live in, we're just a drop of water in the ocean of the universe. We make an unlimited number of choices each day, all of them having some kind of an impact on our future. The only thing we can't make a choice about though to escape is death.

Better hurry this up.

One simple choice can make or break all of our hopes and dreams.

This enough? I think so.

One choice can also make us the happiest people alive or the most miserable.

Don't pussy out now.

One choice could mean we live a while longer or we die.

"Holy shit," I mumble as I make contact with the cold oak wood floor.

This is a choice I can never go back on, even if I want to. Because some choices you make have no kind of backup plan. Once they're made, they're made.

My eyes slowly shut and I feel my thoughts quieting down.

Suicide is one of those choices. You can't back out once you've put your choice into action, even if you want to.

Her face is the last thing I saw.

--- Your P.O.V. ---

"Baby, I'm home!" I called out as I shut the large door behind me. Instead of my husband or even a simple hello from down the hall, I was met with deathly silence.

"Probably gone to the store or something," I thought to myself. I set my f/c purse down on the kitchen table and opened up the cabinet for some Advil. My head was killing me.

His pills are gone.

He always puts them back when he takes them.

Could he have gone to go get them refilled?

No, he just did not two days ago.

I was in full on worried mode now. My heart beat began to go at an unsteadily fast pace. My headache was forgotten about quickly.

"Evan? Honey?" I called again, looking around the house, my mind racing. I went down the hall, to our room.

Nothing.

I looked in the bathroom.

And I saw him.

"Oh no, fuck, Evan??" I came down on my knees, holding my hands on his face. It was cool to the touch. My fingers found themselves on the side of his neck, desperately searching for a pulse.

Nothing.

I sobbed into his chest on the floor, wishing this was a dream, hoping that he wasn't really gone.

But he was.

And his choice destroyed me.

---

Suicide is always an option, but you are not only killing yourself. Think of everyone in your life, how broken they would be if you took your own life. It would destroy them. Suicide is not the answer. Find another way.

Love you all,

- Alex <3