Be Still

The Blame Game

Previously on  Be Still

I quickly wheel out of the room, and to the restroom. Little did I know the parents returned just in time to see the blubbering mess that was me.
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I flush the rest of the wet tissues down the toilet, emerging from the stall feeling like I was all cried out. My eyes teary, but nothing coming out. While I was wiping my face, Mr. Collin, Jack's dad, walked in.

"Hey," he says timidly. I just nod my head in greeting.

" We thought that someone should come after you," he said trying to break the silence. I just sat quietly, brooding, with a few sniffles here and there. There's the treatment I've been receiving ever since the accident. Constantly watched and followed. Like, I was some child that didn't know how to handle himself.

"So, what's been going on with you," he asks, while awkwardly swinging his arms.
" You don't have to do that," I muttered while looking down at my hands,wringing them like a dishtowel.
" Do what," He asks confused as he leaned up against the sink.
" Be nice to me," I say fumbling with the wheel lock.
" Why wouldn't I be?"
" Because I'm the reason your son is in here," I grit.
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"What," he asks as if it's the most incredulous thing," Now why on Earth would you think that."

Why would I think that? Ha! This man must be joking with me.  I was the one driving!
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The night of the accident

" Oh man, that was so much fun," Jack exclaims as we hop in the car.
" I know," I say, while turning to get my seatbelt, " I wonder where the eggs came from," I ask gesturing to our egg covered clothes. A " food fight", more like egg fight broke out.
" Ethan's house is trashed," he howls excitedly in his seat.
" Yeah, his folks are gonna give it to him, fo sho,"I call back as I make my way out of the drive.
" Yeah, but it was a blast," he says with a rush. It was only his first/ second party, so he was pretty hype.
" Yeah, I saw you on the dance floor,
Jackie boy," I exclaim.
" You know I can get down, I got them smooth moves," he said doing a wave motion with his arms.
" Whatever man," I say while turning a corner.
" ' Whatever'? What do you mean whatever? You're just jealous of my sw-
Joshua watch-" he was cut off then.

The bright light blinded my eyes, I saw it before it happened. The sounds worse than a chalk board and equivalent to an exaggerated crumpled paper sound. Glass rained onto the polyester covered seats, and peppered our skin. The impact rattling our brains in our heads. Vibrations weaved it's way through the car's frame. My eyes closed and opened for a split second to horror, as I say my friend's body slouched in a seat. Pain then began to take over me causing my eyes to closed as I slipped away from consciousness.
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I then open my eyes my memory fading, but the grimace on my face remains. It was my fault that night. I saw the car coming, I could've turned faster, something, and maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Now, Jack may never wake up. I remember those being the first few words that greeted my ears when I visited him. I was still in the hospital and wanted to visit Jack. I overheard the doctors say that he had some brain function, and there's a chance for him to wake up, however those were very slim. 10%! My friend has now become a percentage, labeled as a number. Its like we are at the DMV we've taken our ticket and now are waiting for our chance. Jack's chance to wake up, and it doesn't seem like it all because of my stupid mistake.

" I don't know," I shrug. Mr. C waits quietly giving me a blank stare as if he was silently begging me to say something. The pressure began to close in, and I had to stop it before it took over.

"I forced him to come," I utter weakly. Desperation seeps from my tongue. My dirty laundry was in the process of being hung to dry. Is this what he wants, to see me in pain. Well, he has every right, I hurt his son. So, this is fair, I must tell the whole story. Even if Im like the Little Mermaid, who wished for legs, but felt pain in every step. I wished to party, so I must endear this, even if every ounce of telling this story hurts. Now, nothing could stop the ocean erupting from my mouth. I have to let the truth be heard.
" What," he asks," What do you mean?"