Banana Bus Squad Oneshots

Pushing Away - H2OVanoss Fluff

It had been a long while since I'd seen them. I pushed them far away from me. I didn't want to bother them anymore. It's not like I didn't know already that they were just pretending to care.

I just wish they weren't walking towards me now. They didn't need to add insult to injury... I already missed them, but they never liked me. So why did I like them?

None of them had attempted to talk to me... well that's a lie. They said hi, and me being nice I would wave politely with a small  smile. I would continue on my way and none of them attempted to have me join them.

That's how I knew they didn't care. If they did they wouldn't be just sympathetic they'd try to hang out with me and talk to me. None of them did that...

Now here I am in this tree I loved to climb and they were heading straight towards me. I knew they saw me because I kept hearing my name mentioned and a few fingers pointed my way. I don't want to be hurt more. Please, go away.

Soon they were looking up at me from the roots of the tree. I felt my anxiety burn inside me. "Hey Delirious!" My name was shouted up at me, and because of who I was I looked down with a smile, "Hey guys! Been a while."

They wanted me to come down so I did. Their smiles and loud talking presented as friendly and I only could pretend and be nice right back to them. None of them mentioned my long absence as if it never happened. They don't care... I annoy them... I should leave them alone they have more fun without me.

I can't do this...

As I usually did I told them an excuse which they accepted and I quickly left them behind. I'm doing them a favor by leaving. I just annoy them while I'm there. I want to be friends with them... they just don't like me.

"Always Delirious, pushing people away?" I turned around seeing Evan standing there.

Why did you follow me?

"What are you talking about Vanoss?" He scoffed and shook his head, "Stop pretending like you don't know. What happened man?"

Why do you care?

"Sure Vanoss. I really need to get going my-"

"Shut up Del! Stop lying, what's wrong? Do you hate us or something?" I froze in shock. He thought I hated them? I could never hate them. I just wanted to be friends with them, but I knew they didn't like me.

"What? No! Come on man I've just been busy." I laughed a bit trying to hide my true feelings.

It's not like he cares anyways....

"Bullshit. I see you around all the time. You're always walking around and blasting your music in your headphones. Then when you actually do something you're either writing music or angrily working out. Something is wrong Del and you're not telling me. I'm you're friend aren't I?"

I stared at him more in disbelief than anything. Why was he paying attention to what I did? I juts annoy him. I looked down at the ground. Some of my hair fell in front of my eyes but I didn't bother to move it. I was focusing on not telling him the truth.

You only want to tell him because you're an attention whore. That's why you're always annoying!

"Please tell me Jon." Evan had moved closer to me. He pushed up my chin and brushed my hair out of my face revealing a kind, caring smile. I could feel my eyes beginning to well up. "You don't care." I hissed at him.

"Why would you say that? Of course I care. You're my best friend Jon." I didn't want to cry in front of him. If I did he would just feign the sympathetic bullshit everyone says. "None of you care! None of you have ever cared! I'm just an annoying whiny bitch who only wants attention! Just leave me alone you don't like me anyways..."

I tried to get out of Evan's grip but he held me in my place. I looked back at him with tears streaming down my face and probably snot as well. He looked sad and... sympathetic but he wore a small smile. "Jon... you aren't annoying and you definitely don't try to get attention. You're just outgoing and you make everyone smile and laugh. You're the greatest! How could we not care about you? I've been so worried about you man."

I sniffed and replayed his words in my head. I've been pushing them away... do they really care? "Jon, I love having you around. You're my best friend, it just isn't the same without you."

I was then pulled into a hug by Evan and it was what I needed so desperately. He always gave the best hugs and I never felt awkward while doing so. He just held me peacefully while I wept into his shoulder. "It's okay Jonathon. It's okay. Tell me why?"

"I'm not sure why... I just push people away because I think they hate me." Evan held me tighter. "I definitely don't hate you. Hang out with us again Jonathon. We love you."

I nod my head and go back to burying my face into his chest.