Not Ashamed

'Prologue ✓

I walk into the small dorm, looking at it with a mix of optimism and spite. Since I was a child, I've always dreamed of my college career, but now that it's here, it's horrifying.

I drop my bags on the floor, staring at the barren bedroom.

The dorm I've found myself in has two beds, which is to be expected. There's a desk on each side and two dressers sat beside each other at the front.

My eyes take over the room in exhaustion. It's been a long day. Luckily, I didn't have to leave New York, my home, but I still got far away enough from home to feel like I was on my own.

Daring University. The school no one's heard of, and no one cares to. I picked it because I thought it'd be small enough for me to focus properly, but big enough that I'd have something to do other than study.

I notice that there's no personal items in the room, no sign that anyone's moved in. No bags, or posters, or photos or even sheets. I sigh in relief, I was hoping to be the first one here.

I open one of my three bags, not nearly as much as I should have taken to move in, but enough for me. I take out my plain blue duvet and spread it over the bed, throwing a pillow onto the bed along with it. I push the rest of the bags underneath the bed, too lazy to pack them away.

I had put my packing off to the last minute, meaning when I woke up, I rushed around the house to gather everything I needed.

I let my heavy eyelids shut, hoping to feel refreshed when I wake up.

...

My eyes snap open at the sound of the door shutting. For a moment, I forget where I am and panic, but I recognize the little dormitory and calm down. I swing my legs over the side of the bed and rub my eyes. When I look up, I see a guilty looking boy smirking at me.

"Sorry. I tried not to wake you," he says. He looks like no one I've ever seen before. He has shaggy blond hair that's so blond, it fact, it looks white with a tint of yellow. His eyes are deep blue and pop out of his pale, next to colourless features. His smile, dear god, his smile. Even though it looks quite sheepish it's the happiest smile I'd ever seen.

"Don't sweat it," I stretch my legs, having slept with them bent in front of my stomach. "I had to get up eventually."

"Long day?" He sits down on his bed, laying his chin on his fist.

" 'Guess so."

"Me too. I'm Axel. Axel Tomas." He holds a hand out for me to shake that I take politely.

"I'm Finnick Harrison. Call me Finn."

He pulls away, grinning at me. "Good to meet you, Finn. Looks like we're roommates."

"I'd hope so, if not than you're just some guy that moved his stuff in and watched me sleep."

Axel laughs, shaking his head. "So, where are you from?"

"Brooklyn. You?"

"Albany."

"Not bad."

Axel grins, nodding. "So, Brooklyn, what's your major? You don't seem like the type to just major in literature or History."

I roll my eyes. "Thats because I'm not. My major happens to be law, actually."

"Really? You have a passion for arguing, yeah?"

"Not at all. It's my dad's idea, actually. I wanted to do animation, but both him and my mom insist that drawing isn't a career so..."

"Sounds like a nightmare," Axel says, sympathy coating every syllable. "So, you're parents don't support you at all?"

"Nope," I say. "What about you? What's your big plan for the future?"

"I'm majoring in theatre. I'm hoping that one day, I'll play a lead role on Broadway."

"Good for you," I tell him, and I genuinely mean it. He's going after what he wants to do, not cowering behind lies like me. I respect him for it. "What do your parents think?"

"Fully supportive. They always have been. My mother put me into my first play in middle school. Since then, I've been addicted."

I'm a little surprised, but I try not to let on as such. "Well, I'm happy for you, though I must say I'm a little disappointed. I was hoping we could make an 'I'm not who my parents wanted me to be' club."

"As fun as it sounds, I don't think I make the cut."

"Yeah yeah, Mr Privilege, whatever. Your parents love you," I joke in a fake spiteful voice. Axel rolls his eyes and laughs.

He eyes flash up to the clock that he must've put up over the door.

"Wow, I didn't realize it was so late. I think I'm going to go to sleep."

"I probably should too. I still don't feel like I've slept enough."

Axel smiles. "Until tomorrow then, Finn."