A Match Into Water (Cake)

1x01

'loved by many i'm still lonely'

I walked to my locker trying to avoid anyone who was trying to have a conversion with me. I opened my locker quickly and grabbed my math book. I hate mornings, like every fucking child in the world. But I mostly hate mornings because I have math in the morning. Why can’t I have it in the afternoon? By then I would have had some food and I’d be ready to learn. Maybe I can complain about it to someone and they’ll change my class to the afternoon. It’s still not going to change my grades though.

I groaned mentally in my mind and closed my locker. I shoved my headphones into my ears and blasted Falling In Reverse as I walked to math. I got to math class and sat down at my desk that was all the way in the back away from everyone. Only one person sits around me. Her name is Annabelle. I call her Anna for short. She had really long dyed blue hair and she had a lip and nose ring thing. She’s really nice though. I only copy off of her notes because I can’t see the board. I’m pretty glad she’s not a bitch because then I would really be failing math. She walked into the classroom and ripped one of my ear things out of my ear. I should really look up what they are.

“I’m skipping. Family problems,” she sighed, “Can you take notes for me, please?” I nodded. She smiled wide, “Thanks Cal.” And with that she left. The only reason I can’t see the damn board is because I refuse to wear my glasses. My mum got me those really big nerdy looking ones. I told her I didn’t want them but she got them for me anyways. I guess I was going to have to wear them today. I mean I do owe her. The bell rang and class started. I opened my math binders and my glasses were sitting right on my paper. I sighed quietly and put them on. I fixed my beanie a bit and started to write down notes. I still had one ear thing in while the teacher wrote stuff onto the board.

 I’m not a big fan of school. I mean who is? I have other things to be doing with my life honestly. But I am looking forward to college. Crazy, I know. But I’m going to go to this great music school in New York. I haven’t got accepted yet but my grades are better than what they want and I made sure my essay that I wrote was long enough. Why wouldn’t they want me in their college anyway? I’m pretty awesome. The thing I mostly hate about school is the homework or work in general. It’s stupid. We do work in class for about 6 or so hours of the day then when we get home we have to do homework that we mostly don’t understand for another 2 hours or so. I’m pretty dumb when it comes to math so it takes me 2 hours and a half, yeah about that.

 I’m good at English though. I have a 90 in it, which I am pretty proud of. My teacher thinks I’m good at writing and stuff like that. I just think the teacher is raising my grade because she doesn’t want me to fail so I have to go back into her class. So anyways, for Science and Social Studies I have an 85 or higher. My goal is to have an 85 or higher in every class. It’s working out pretty well this year. There’s your proof that if someone tells me I might get into my dream college if I get better grades I’ll do it. But then there’s math. Math is the reason why I have an 85 in total grades. I don’t mind it but the college I want to go to wants an 85 or higher so that’s barely passing it. I have a 70 in math. I do my homework and class-work, it’s just that I don’t do well on quizzes and tests. Teachers want me to stay after but I always make a lame excuse to not do it. Yes, I do want to get my grade up in math but I don’t think staying after is going to help anything. It might, I don’t know nor do I want to find out.

My mum can honestly careless about my grades. Ever sense my dad left us, we’ll call him Tom for now, well Tom isn't really his name but whatever. So ever sense he left my mum has been depressed. So Tom, my dad, and my mum were always fighting. It kept me up all the time. I think it also kept the people who lived across from us up too. I’m not quiet sure. So anyways, Tom and my mum were fighting even before I was born. My mum tells me that she had me only to safe her stupid marriage that was already ruined from the beginning. Once my dad finally left my mum has gotten a drug and drinking problem and she never wants to get up or do anything. She just sits on the couch all the time and doesn’t do anything. When she gets up to go somewhere it’s usually to the local pharmacy to get more pills that she ‘needs’ and trust me, I think she drugs the freaking doctor to get him to sign the stupid slip for her to get the pills.