His Fire,Her Ice

winter's heart

It was hard to see Jon lying there helpless, on that bed.
His chest heaving up and down as he took short breaths. I longed to hear the sound of his voice even if it would be in an argument. I just wanted to hear it. To look into his eyes those dark brown eyes, eyes that made me feel strong but helpless all at the same time. I longed for those eyes to open,to look at me as though they looked into my soul.

I walked over from the wall I was leaning against to his bed. The room now smelled like him,like fresh cold air and the hearth.

I sat on his bed. His right hand was near my lap, I picked it up and slowly intertwined my fingers with his. I stroked his hand with my thumb slowly back and forth. He stirred in his slip and griped my fingers tighter, I was a little taken aback by it but I relaxed into his grip.

Maybe he could feel presence.

I smiled a bit to myself. They door opened behind us and I quickly dropped his hand, I would have stood up but I remembered I am a queen and a queen does not need to explain herself. All I was doing was taking care of an allie,right.

"Excuse me your grace,we need to attend to the king" Davos said making his way into the room,with Tormund walking closely behind him.

The servant women,had been the ones bathing Jon but Davos and sometimes Tormund would be there while they took care of him. He had been unconscious for two of the five days it took to reach  dragonstone from east watch.

"I was about to leave,carry on" I stood up almost like a little girl who had been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

I stepped of the room but my body didn't want to go too far away from the room so I let out a breath and leaned against the wall. Close enough for me to hear but far enough for me not to be seen eaves dropping. There was no one in the hallway.

"I'm tired of seeing his tiny pecker ,can't he just wake up already"

"Shut up,lad. It's not like you're being made to go near it. The servants are the ones doing that, so suck it up. Its probably even bigger than what you have hiding in your pants".

" He wishes,us free folk are more equip than you fancy folk"

The squabble between Tormund and Davos made me want to burst out in laughter. I walked to my bed chamber for fear of rolling on the ground in tears.

Late in the night after dinner was over, I went to check on Jon. I opened the door slightly and told two of my unsullied to wait outside.

I sat on his bed i as i had done before but this time i did not hold on to his hand i just sat there staring at the wall.

I could feel him moving from where I sat next to him. Slight movements. His hand,his body and  lastly his eyelids. He was awake.

I looked at him wondering if he thought it would be strange that I was on his bed. I looked around a bit before finding his eyes again. I caught a brief glimpse of his scars that i had seen the first night he came back. A knife in the heart. Not a figure of speech. I was drawn out of my thoughts.

"I'm sorry ,I'm so sorry"

I stared at him.

"I wish we hadn't gone. I wish I could take it all back but I can't and I can't tell you how sorry I am".

I remembered my child,Viserion had died at the hands of the night king and I would not sit idle watching as the night king destroyed everything. He would have to pay for his crimes against me,for taking my child away and for almost taking Jon away.