Excerpts From My Brain

To all the ones for whom my heart had beat for

I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being good enough, laugh and talk more. I'm sorry for always lying and isolating myself and never speak a word about what I feel or think, I'm sorry for not letting none of you in and push you away, and most of all I'm sorry for have never met with your expectations even when everything I've done was in some way, for little it was, to please you. But well you know, nothing ever goes accord the plan or how you want it.

I always end up alone and hurt because I expect from people to stay and care about me. Most of you never did, or at least not enough to haven't break my heart. And after everything I still keep apologizing about being hurt, and for this my mind found the only answer I thought possible of why it happens so often, perhaps it's because there might be something wrong with me that makes everyone stab me in the back, or even worse, in the chest.

And I can no longer keep apologizing anymore for just trying to grow and accepting myself for who I am so I can show this person to you, I can't carry on feeling broken inside and not wanting to fight, after everything I've been through with my friends I can't just give up because I'm losing my head. I know I'm stronger than that. So if I keep my distance from you and you are not sure about what is the reason for it, you must know is part my fault, but also yours.