If you're gonna read this book, ya might need some background information on my English teacher.
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On the first day of school, he made it a point to announce to every English class that he does NOT have a speech impediment.
Apparently it sounds cool when people change sk at the end of a word to x or ks. So he will always say ax or dex instead of ask or desk
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Also, putting a t at the end of a word is so stupid and troublesome. Some rapper changed waste to was (pronounced wase) in a song. That must make it cool, right?
If you have a question abou the tes, feel free to ax it at the teacher's dex, and he'd love to answer it.
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If your class isn't payong attention and asks the same question multiple times or doesn't know what's going on, he gets SUPER salty and starts talking like the sloths in Zootopia because people were lost, so he must be moving too quickly for our brains to keep up.
That gets a little annoying after an hour.
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Finally, this teacher tends to hate advanced classes. He's friends with the super seniors and stoners instead.
Nothing against advanced students, but stoners and super seniors are more honest and true to themselves. They won't sell their soul for half a letter grade like advanced students will.
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And a couple of random quick facts:
If a song pops into his head, we are stopping class to look it up on YouTube and blast it at full volume.
When it's time for lunch, he makes everyone stay in their seats until he dismisses them because he wants to beat them to the lunch line.
Every time he bends over he yells like he's being raped.
He relates everything to a story about an old girlfriend from college.
The cover for this book is his background screen on his computer.
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If that didn't scare you away, feel free to keep reading. It gets better. We haven't even gotten into the actual quotes yet!
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Quotes from a Wacky English Teacher
Random"Can we do a little focusing on English and not on innuendos?" My English teacher is really. . . interesting. I mean, does your high school English teacher body check you in the hallway, call you by the name of a character in a TV show, or make ran...