Despair of the heart

Chapter 13 - The Graves

CHAPTER 13: THE GRAVES

Usagi’s POV

Misaki started freaking out; he started saying, “I have to go. Now, I have to go now” over and over again.

“Misaki…hey Misaki calm down…” I was trying to get him to calm down but words didn’t seem to work.

I was holding his wrists trying to stop him from running out into the street. That’s when he looked at me with pleading eyes and said, “Please…U-Usagi-san please… you have to understand… please… I don’t want to remember anymore…p-please…Usagi-san…” 

“Why don’t you two just wait in the car” Minami said apparently understanding what Misaki was going through, being face to face with the kid his brother died saving.

She didn’t have to tell me twice “Misaki, is that ok?” I had to make sure that it was what he meant by getting out of this place.

“Y-yes…please…” that was all I needed to hear.

I turned to the two standing in front of us and said, “if you’ll excuse us…” with that I grabbed Misaki’s hand and walked him out of the shrine and to the car.

Before we were out the door I heard the woman say, “I’m really sorry I didn’t mean to upset him. We just wanted to offer our condolences…”

We had walked half way to the parking lot when I heard the kid’s voice behind us yelling for us to wait for him. I stopped and turned around Misaki followed my action. As much as I didn’t want Misaki to go through this, the kid might say something that might give Misaki the courage to move on.

“Please… just wait a second…” the kid was panting between his words. He stood facing us as he said to Misaki “you were the one that was there on the day of the accident weren’t you? Did you know him?”

Misaki’s nodded slightly, his tears still falling. The kid started again “Of course you knew him, you won’t be crying if you didn’t…” trailing off when he saw Misaki’s gaze drift to the ground, his grip tightened around mine. “I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to upset you… I just wanted to say that thanks to him I’m standing here talking to you. He is my hero; I’m alive today because of him.”

“H-he will always be mine…” Misaki whispered as he heard what the boy had said.

“I really wish that he was alive so I could thank him face to face. Now I understand how precious life is and how fleeting it could be…one moment you are here and the next your just…gone.”

The boy was staring at his shoes as he said that. He then looked up and with a warm smile replacing the frown on his face before he added, “I’m sure that he was a great person. I really believe that he is in a better place right now.” With a nod he turned around and ran back inside.

We got to the car and I opened the passenger door for him and led him to his seat, shutting the door after. I then got into my seat on the driver’s side then I took a breath and exhaled. This day was tuning out to be more exhausting than I thought.

“Misaki…” I turned in my seat to face him. He had his face in his hands as he sobbed. I placed my hand over his head and tousled his hair “will you be ok…?”

“I’m s-sorry...I ju- I just…”

“It’s ok you don’t have to explain” he lowered his hands and tilted his head slightly towards me.

“I j-just didn’t expect to…see him again… I just…” His words were cut short by a sob. I really hated seeing him like this, in so much pain and the cause is a mere memory… and yet it’s not just a memory it is what happened in that memory that shifted his whole universe. An event that made him relive a suppressed trauma that took a very long time to get over.