What is up, everybody, I'm your host, Killer Keemstar! Let's get right into the news," he shouted into the camera in his usual, dragged out fashion.
"Today, we're not going to have a story. Today, we're doing something a little different," he continued, and picked up his camera. Daniel walked down the hall.
Thousands waited in suspense as to what the news channel gnome had waiting in the wings.
"Today, we have a couple of special guest stars," he said, opening a closet door. "Leafyishere, Pyrocynical and Filthy Frank!"
Daniel could feel himself losing subscribers by the minute as his credibility died. Leafyishere, Pyrocynical and Filthy Frank were not sitting in Daniel Keem's closet. They were perfectly fine, probably watching at home as Daniel revealed three pictures of the YouTubers.
The first picture came from the first YouTuber's face reveal, the second was a picture that Keem had leaked months before. The third was simply Filthy Frank's icon on his channel. All three pictures were taped to body pillows. They were tied up together.
"Haha," Daniel laughed, making sure that the false evil was present. "They're terrified for their lives!"
He panned to the three pillows.
Silence fell over the gnome as he panned to the three YouTubers in a somewhat desperate way. He knew he was losing subscribers quickly- the onset of hate was coming faster than Daniel was prepared to handle. Perhaps he shouldn't have involved himself in so much drama at once. All those baseless accusations that he made, the pictures he'd leaked, all those nights wasted- and for what reward? Panning to three pictures of YouTubers taped to body pillows, trying to convince your audience that they were the real thing? Daniel began to think.
He turned off his camera and sat down next to the body pillow with the image of Pyrocynical. In a fit of desperation and realization that his life was going somewhere undesirable, he embraced the pillow and sobbed into the sideways hair of Pyrocynical's picture. His beanie fell to the floor, and his beard scraped against the paper.
"You're a good content creator," he whispered. "I didn't mean any of those things I said. God, Pyro, you probably hate me."
In his fit of crying, he realized that he had been crushing the other body pillows. This made Daniel sob harder, and he began to embrace the other pillows with Leafyishere and Filthy Frank depicted on the front.
"You're all good content creators," he shouted.
He decided that sitting here, crying over these YouTubers simply wasn't enough. Daniel had to stare what he did in the face, so he walked back to his computer, body pillows tucked under his arms. He sat down and watched the Content Cop that had been made on him days earlier. The body pillows absorbed many more tears from Daniel Keem, as did his beard.
