I Always Know

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"I lay down in the soft grass and watch the clouds go by. As I lay there, your hand slides slowly towards mine, and then all at once our fingers are intertwined. I tear my eyes away from the sky and look at you. You are so beautiful. God you are just wonderful. I smile softly, and move closer to you, resting my head on your shoulder. Your arm wraps around me and my breath goes short. I am grinning so much and i am trying to hide it. 
Even though I know you know. You always know.
Then, the clouds cover the sunlight, and its like the mood changes. You sit up, and it feels like you're not next to me anymore. I sit up as well, resting my hands in my lap as I cross my legs.
"What is it?" I ask. 
She turns towards me, her brow furrowed and her voice harsh. "You already know." She replies. 
"Don't." I plead, closing my eyes as I lower them to the ground.
"I'm not here." She says.
Then I open my eyes, and like always, I am in my bed, staring at my wall. My breath hitches as I whisper, "I know. I always know.""

- Excerpts Of A Book I Couldn't  Never Write #10

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