FtM Transgender???

chapter #22: The Satanist has feelings

A/N hey guys! so I last updated last week, I would have on Easter weekend but where i was didn't have a computer i could use xs and i had my cousins baby crawling all over me cause he loved me so much ahah it was cute but man by the end of the day i was so tired, anyways today i told the girl i like that i like her, though it was threw a card, cause I'm awkward and soooo on the back it was all check yes or no if you like me, she out a heart in the yes box :3 heheh so i'm happy anyways on to the story!!!!

Dane's P.O.V

 Waking up that morning was pain full, my right eye was all swollen shut again and I couldn't even touch it. Sliding off my bed, I stumble to my dresser where my mirror is. Looking on the dresser I notice there was another mask, it was kind of like mine but it had a long thin nose and two big purple dots on the cheeks, there was no eyes, but I knew I would be able to see through it. Next to it was a note that read. 

" Sorry for beating you up again.... I was drunk, but I know I shouldn't blame it on that all the time...so here's another mask kid.

~Mac"

Putting the note down, I try on my new mask, I liked it, it wasn't as serious as my other one. Once getting some fresh clothes picked out, I head for the bathroom to shower. It was around 10:30 am and no one was awake yet though I could hear Mac's radio from his room. Locking the bathroom door behind me, I start the shower and strip down an step into the shower, it was nice and warm. It felt great on my sore body, it had so many bruises on it now, I'm amazed I'm even up and walking today. After my shower, I sneak back into my room as I heard someone in the kitchen, my room was like the only place where I could stay and be safe, no one bothered me there cause really if you're not out there where they can see you they wont think about you much at all, it's like the saying "outta sight outta mind". Putting on my blue star t-shirt and black jeans, I take a another look at my eye, still swollen but the warm water helped it a little, feeling brave enough, I lean in closer to the mirror and try to gently open my right eye, at first it hurt so much I couldn't bare it but after a few more try's I finally open it wide enough and long enough to see it, stumbling back wards I couldn't believe  what I saw, my eye had turned black, like yes around the eye was black and purple but my eye! where everything was, the pupil, the lens, the eye colour, but now it was all black! what the hell happen to my eye!  Getting up I grab my new mask and put it on, I walk around my room thinking of what to do, I could go storm down on Mac but he might beat me again or just not do anything about it and probably wont tke me to a doctor either, and if I went to a doctor they would ask what happen and what am I to say, I get beat at my only home? the only place I can live at, cause I sure as hell know my mother would just send me to another horrible place and it would probably be worse then this place... what was I to do... hearing a knock on the door snaped me out of my train of thought. Sitting on the edge of my bed I get ready for who ever was on the other side of it.

"yes?" I mumble from under the mask

" it's Mac.... can I come it?"  hearing the shuffling of his feet, I could tell he was a bit uncomfortable.

"emm... sure I guess." I held my head down as he entered my room, closing the door behind him, I was worried he might hurt me again, but I try not to show any fear. for a moment no one moved nor talked, just stayed in the places we were at. After a few more moment like that, I hear his foot steps come straight at me, I tighten my grip on my bed but to my surprise he knelled down in front of me and moved my mask gently to sit on top of my head. He then looked over my face and saw all the damage he had done, then with his fingers began to open my right eye, flinching away from the pain, he frowns a bit and whispers soft words to me as he trys again, after the third time, he opened it just enough to see that it was all black, letting go of my face, his arms fall to his sides as his hair fell into his face. if I didn't know any better, it seemed like he was upset with himself.

"I'm sorry love.... I'm sorry for what I said about you to Lilian yesterday too... I know it's not true, I know why your mother sent you to me, I know your actually a girl but I also understand that you are trans, and I don't judged ya... your mother told me her side of it as if it would make me hate you like the way she does but it only made me wanna take you in more, I know it doesn't look like it, and I know I've been an ass to you but the last few weeks have been stressful and my drinking went out of hand, it doesn't make up for what I have done to you, and I am deeply sorry, my past wasn't a good one either, my father beat me so when I drink to much I become like him... a monster and I hate that.... but I don't want to be a monster to you, I don't want you to hate me or fear me...this house can be crazy at times but I know it's way better then the one with your mom. I just....I-I" shaking a little with his words, I can tell he wants to cry....but he's holding it all in, slowly moving my hand, I rest it softly on his shoulder, then with a blink of an eye he had me in his arms, we both were on the floor now and my mask had fallen off. He was rocking us back and forth, soon I felt a few drops hit my arm... he was crying.... but just like that he let me go and stormed out of my room, leaving me to stare at my open door in shock. The satanist has feelings after all....

I'm not sure how long I just sat there after that, it seemed like moments but when I came back to reality, it was dawn and my door was closed. I could smell something yummy and when I started looking around, I saw a hot plate of pasta with a glass of pop, I wonder who put it here... grabing the fork I dig in and boy was it good, who ever made this was an amazing cook! After eating all my pasta and drinking my pop, I layed on my bed adn think of what happen earlier today. Rising my hand I watch it as I strach it and wiggle my fingers, then slowly I slowler it to my right eye. It didn't hurt that bad anymore but it was still swollen shut, tomorrow would be sunday, then there will be school... I really don't wanna go to a school... I'll just be a freak wearing my masks and having blue hair... I kind of liked it but I know other people will think it's weird and jugde me for it... I really didn't want to go through that...I really don't wanna go to school ever again.. I'd rather just do home schooling. slipping into a restful sleep, the last thing I hear is the creeking of my door being open.

.... maybe I was wrong about Mac, maybe he is a good guy after all....

A/N Hope you like this chapter! it almost made me cry from the feels! Mac has feelings after all! omg i think this is my fav chapter so far, the feels are so strong to me like oh gezz! X,D