[CLOSED FOR SUBMISSIONS] Stronger than You 2017

Part 14: No Misses Kidman. Domestic Abuse is Never Complicated

Written by: Anonymous

Nicole Kidman got her Emmy. Congrats on that! I didn't see the TV series but I have heard about her acceptance speech.

"Domestic abuse is a complicated, insidious disease."

I hate the word "complicated". It's a trendy one which we use when we want to avoid using the proper one. E.g. "I am in a complicated relationship".

No honey, you are not. You are having sex with someone who doesn't want to call-introduce you "girlfriend/boyfriend". It's simple. You have accepted a situation that most likely you don't like but you have settled for this for fear that this is your best option. There is nothing complicated about that.

Domestic abuse is never complicated. Someone is an asshole because he/she thinks that he/she entitled to this and someone is the victim. People suffer, people die because of that, people end up in hospitals and when the doctor will ask "how did this happen?" what do you think will take for an answer?

"It's complicated"? What is complicated?

There was a solar eclipse and the gravity changed and the door hit you on the head? Do you people really believe things like that?

Of course, people say a lot of lies.

"It was an accident. I feel on the pavement. I fell from the stairs. It's my fault."

Well let me tell you something that you probably already know but you haven't realized. It's a different kind of bruises when you fell or hit by accident and a total distinct set of bruises when someone hits you on purpose.

So, it's not complicated. It's simple. It's never justified. Yet it is simple. Someone hit you and he/she did it again and again. On purpose. It's not a disease. You can't give someone any type of drugs and they will cure them for the "disease".

He/she will never stop feel entitled to hit someone else and have no guilts or remorse on that whatsoever. It's not a fever, a rush, or low blood sugar. An abuser if he/she get mad he/she will check the environment. If he/she is with the victim he will become violent. If he/she is among people whom he/she can abuse he/she will stay calm.

Someone who has e.g. fever will have that no matter the time and the place. You are an asshole not a sick person. A sick person will ask for help and treatment an abuser will never do it because he/she sees no fault on what he/she does. The other people are to put the blame on because they make him/her mad.

If they were "nice", he/she would have never been like that. He/she is the true victim, not one with the bruises. (Yes people, say crap like that, and calling them in public "sick", you are giving them one more asset to go on abusing people

I haven't seen her series, so I am not talking about it.

On the other hand, I will talk you about something I know well. If domestic abuse is a taboo, rape by the soon to be ex-husband is a common place and in most countries, there isn't a law that protects women against marital rape.

A husband is entitled to have sex with his wife, despite her will and that's legit. You had sex with him yesterday and you may even like it. You have no right to say him "no" if today you don't want to have sex.

His wish, his command and you comply or he can do whatever you wish with you without any respect.

People get together, stay together and sometimes they decide to go on separate ways. It doesn't matter who makes that decision.

When a couple says, "now we broke up" for the common mind that means "ok, no more sex between us".

Well for married men mostly, even if they made the decision to break up, they still think that they can have sex with their ex-wives whenever they wish and almost everyone will attack and rape his wife till the divorce is finalized.