Everybody Loves A Clown (A Deadpool and Harley Quinn Love Story)

Busted!

As for Joker, his plan didn't go so well. In fact, it backfired horribly. He came back into the funhouse, in a shitty mood. He called out, "Harley! Wade! Where are ya?" He looked around, until he barged into Harley's room. He saw Harley naked in bed with Sideshow Wade, also naked. They were both asleep. This enraged Joker, as he yelled out, "TRAITOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The yell was enough to wake the two lovebirds up. They saw Joker, Harley giving a look of fright as she used the sheets to cover her breasts. "Who the fuck is pizza face over here?" Joker demanded ready to kill. "Oh hey boss," said Wade, "it's not what it looks like. Oh wait a minute, yeah, it is what it looks like." He smirked and raised his middle finger at Joker, flipping him off, enraging him further. The Ace of Knaves recognized him and growled, "Sideshow Wade... I'm not surprised Harley would be a slut! But you... I'm disappointed in you... I gave you everything! I gave you a home, I gave you food! AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?!?!?!?!" Wade got out of bed and laughed. "What's the matter puddin'? You jealous that my super penis is better than your limp biscuit?" That did it. Joker got out his gun and shot Sideshow Wade in the head, his head exploding with blood and brains everywhere. He fell to the floor. "WADE!!!!!" cried Harley. Joker mocked her, "oh, I got Wade all over my shoe!" He then smacked Harley hard with his gun. He then grabbed her throat, pinning her to the wall. "You gonna kill me?" gagged Harley. Joker laughed, "why would I do that? Killing you would make you a martyr, and we wouldn't want that, now would we? No, no, no, I'm going to dump you in the Boo Box. Then I'm gonna get a new trophy wife. I think the Commissioner's lovely daughter would be a fine piece for me to bear a child, don't you think?"

"Leave her alone Joker," she gagged, "we already know she's Bratgirl. You've given her enough hell already!" Tears streamed down her eyes, and she was terrified, especially of what could happen to Barbara. "Too bad," said Joker, "say goodnight, Gracie!" Suddenly, there was groaning. The groaning belonged to the supposedly deceased Sideshow Wade, his head fully healed, he got up, saying, "what the hell..?" His eyes widened. "Fuck... I remember everything!" Joker and Harley looked like they saw a ghost. "How are you not dead???" asked Joker. "That's cuz I'm Wade Wilson, bitch!" he replied, "I got me a healing factor. I'm Deadpool, motherfucker!" He then lunged at Joker, causing the clown to release Harley from his grip. She gasped and coughed, breathing for air, and watched as the naked Wade Wilson bitchslapped her ex boyfriend. He took Joker's gun, holding it at Joker's face gunpoint. "I'm about to do to you what Disney did to Doug;" threatened Wade, "no, wait... all those changes done to the Disney version of Doug were done by the creator... I got a better one... I'm about to do to you what Mike Myers did to Cat in the Hat!" Joker was terrified. He couldn't believe that he had this maniac for a henchman! "No Wade!" protested Harley, "not like this!"

"What do you mean, not like this? Why are you even defending him?" asked Wade. "No, no," she said, giving Wade a different gun, "like this." She pulled the trigger, and out came a flag that says, "BANG!" Wade looked at the gun, and Harley grinned an evil grin and said, "you know what to do with that gun, doc." Wade realized and gave an evil Grinchy grin as he rolled Joker over, and pulled down his pants and underwear, revealing his pasty pale buttocks. "What are you doing?" asked Joker. Wade then shoved the flag gun up Joker's ass, right in his anus. Joker screamed in agonizing pain so loudly, it could potentially rival Black Canary. Harley then got her jester suit on, not wearing any underwear or socks, she didn't however, put on makeup or her jester cap or mask. "I'm leaving you, Joker. And I'm never coming back to you. Don't even bother to look for me. Come on Wade, put on some clothes." Wade nodded and stole Joker's boxers, put them on, then the clown costume and clown shoes, minus the collar. "Just remember puddin'," said Wade, "I'm letting you live because Harley let you live, and I got a soft spot for her. You ever look in her general direction ever again, and you will learn in the worst of ways that I got hard spots too. Wait, that didn't come out right. Or did it?" Harley and Wade then left as Harley said, "you know, I'm glad to know your name is Wade."