Him

CHAPTER 13

I couldn't get the thought out of my head. Could it really be her? I mean it's been years. All the memories came flooding back and all of a sudden I had the urge to wring my hands. I barely heard Penny when she spoke." So what do u think of this cap?"

"Huh?" I answered,showing that I clearly wasn't listening." Come on Lizzy, holidays are almost over. I don't wanna waste these last moments." She pleaded. I gave a small smile . "I really am sorry, but I'm listening now,."

She eyed me suspiciously." What is wrong with you. Ever since the party you have been distant."

I looked at her. I wanted so badly to tell her but I don't like opening up. The more you open yourself up the more chance you have of getting hurt. I decided to keep my face straight.  I don't think I was ready to open up just  yet. 

Later that evening

I tossed and turned in my sleep. I kept having the same nightmares over and over. I got up with a cold sweat running down my back. I quickly recited my name and my address. A method I learnt from therapy.

Gosh just a glimpse of what might be her and she is already haunting my dreams

Her name is  Riley. She used to be the child of my mum's friend. So I automatically had to be hers. She was always nasty to me but it was manageable, that was until we entered our later years of  primary school. She would gather her friends to gang upon me and bully me until I broke down in tears. She destroyed whatever little  self confidence I  had. That was until I had an anxiety attack.
Afterwards we moved and I went to therapy. That's why I still have anxiety problems up until today.

I felt tears threatening to escape as I  thought back to those days. Many people will think I'm  being childish  but you will never know what I went through, what she did broke me. I couldn't hold it back any longer and I could feel hot tears running down my cheeks until i eventually fell off to sleep. 

I was used to it though, crying myself to sleep that is.