SHATTERED

The Bracelet

"This great failure that damaged my soul.. Maybe to not feel pain is to not feel at all"

Joy

I smiled at Jayson as I turned to the next page.. "you're very romantic" I smiled at him.. "I miss him" he sighed.. "we both did" I smiled.. Jayson started the car and we drove back to St. Peters to visit Cole.. "do you have any music??" jayson smiled.. I smiled as I grabbed the Katy Perry album Cole gave me.. "this the only thing i got" i smiled.. "great!" Jayson smiled as he grabbed the CD and entered it in his player..

The music begin to play and Ieaned back to my seat as I tried to relax.. "whats the title of this song??" Jayson asked.. "I dont know Save as Draft??" I replied unsurely.. Jayson smiled.. "I like this song!" he said happily.. "its also Cole's fave kinda" I smiled.."fasten your seatbelt" Jayson smiled as we rushed through the highway..

We stopped at a convenient store to buy chips for Cole's funeral.. "you sure you wanna stay here??" Jayson asked.. I smiled and nodded.. Jayson then went inside the store and grabbed some chips.. I smiled as I stared outside the car window.. I smiled as I saw two bestied talking and laughing.. I smiled as I remember Cole and I when we hang out.. I took my phone and stared at my homescreen.. My wallpaper was Cole and I when we celebrated the acquaintance party back when we were freshmen..

I remembered how enjoyed we were how much fun we had.. I stared at the young Cole who used to smile the sweetest.. The jolly problem free young Cole.. At least he was happy back then.. I smiled recalling our cold memories.. But cant help but shed a tear as I realized something.. That I will never see that sweet innocent smile ever again.. I began to cry as I realized that ill never be with Cole ever again..

Jayson came back with a bag of potato chips.. "Cole's fave snack" Jayson smiled.. I smiled back as Jayson went back inside the car.. He put the chips on the backseat and started the car.. "lets go??" he smiled.. I nodded as we drove on our way to St. Peters.. "do you really love him??" I smiled as I asked Jayson.. He looked at me and looked back at where he was driving.. There was a complete silence inside the car..

And I know that Ive already cross the line.. "Im sorry" I said thinking that I hurt him.. Jayson was still silent.. I was already thinking about how to slip outside the car without him noticing.. Awkwardness spread everywhere.. "yes" Jayson smiled..

I sighed in relief.. "as a friend??" i asked again.. Shit okay im offially a stupid person.. "nope" jayson smiled as he continued driving.. I leaned back and shut my fucking mouth before i ask another stupid question..

We reached St. Peters and Jayson parked the car at the parking lot.."Denise invited me to go to her party tonight" Jayson said.. "Denise Pagan?? Didnt she know its Cole's funeral and shes throwing a party??" i asked furiously.. "I know thats why Im not going" Jayson smiled at me..

But I cant help but notice Jayson's phone always vibrating.. "let me guess Denise??" i asked.. Jayson nodded as he turned his phone off.. "that bitch" i finally said.. "lets go??" jayson smiled as we went inside the building..

We sat down at the couch.. The place was quiet.. I took Cole's journal and smiled at Jayson.. "shall we??" i asked.. Jayson smiled and nodded.. "read it quietly tho.. People will hear us" jayson smiled