Sight || yoo seonho ✔

✿| 0.72

♣Seonho♣

I peeked through the small window of the door and saw Guanlin hyung sitting on a chair with his head laying on my bed, which indicates that he was sleeping. I silently opened the door and changed my clothes, then tip-toed towards my bed, but being the sensitive sleeper he is, the moment I sat down on my bed, his eyes opened.

"Seonho?" His eyes suddenly opened wide as he saw me, in an awkward mid-crawl position on the bed.

"Uh hello," I sheepishly answered, preparing myself for a ten-minute nagging from my brother.

"Oh my god, it's you Seonho!"

He sprung up up his seat and immrdiately hugged me tightly. "I was so worried! You brat!" He smacked the back of my neck, making me wince in pain.

"Guanlin, It hurts!"

"It should be!" He exclaimed, "You knew that you weren't in a good condition yet to go outside and yet you do this!? Can't you even think a bit!?"

I silently scratched the back of my neck, "I'm sorry. I just wanted to spend my days with Sohyun. Today was the last."

Guanlin's eyes turned from fiery red to a calming blue gaze. "What do you mean by last?"

I stayed silent. And it was at this moment his face stiffened.

"Don't tell me... You knew?"

I avoided eye contact and looked towards the window.

"Since when?"

"About six months ago," I said, still avoiding contact from him.

"I-Is that why you strated hanging out with Sohyun? The girl you only looked after from afar?"

I just nodded.

"No wonder you were acting really strange lately." Guanlin heaved a deep sigh. "So you knew..."

I turned to him. "Yeah. And all those white lies you and mom told me... I never even believed it one bit. There was still a chance? Tsk. What nonsense."

Now it was Guanlin's turn to be silent.

"Come on hyung, tell me," I said, tears starting to flow out of my head.

"All of these... these treatments, they never meant anything right? It couldn't cure me and my sickness. It has already reached a level where even the best doctors couldn't cure it. The only thing these treatments could do was prolong my short life."

I grabbed his shoulders and made him face me. His eyes were already filled with tears that could flow out any moment. I could tell from his hardened expression that he was trying his best not to cry.

"Tell me hyung, in the end, I will still die right? Right?"

Guanlin hyung bursted out crying, and hugged me tightly as tears continued to flow down my soft cheeks. "I'm sorry, Seonho. I'm really sorry. There was nothing we could do, there was nothing that I could do..."

I sniffed, "It's okay,Guanlin hyung. Maybe it was meant for me to end up this way. Afterall, I never liked my life even once. Well..." I sighed, "I did spend my whole life imprisoned in a place called home. So it was a given for me to feel this way."

"But then..." I added, "I tried to do everything I wanted, so that I could leave without regrets, so that I could leave contentedly, but then hyung, I think that recently, there has been something— a someone, that I couldn't bear to leave."

Guanlin looked at me with eyes full of sympathy, for he probably knew who I meant.

"But then—" My sentence was cut off when I coughed, and a few more followed after that, making me unable to continue what I was saying.

"Seonho are you okay!?" He stood up and patted my back softly as I covered my mouth with my right hand.

"Crap," I heard him mutter under his breath as soon as he saw blood on my hands.

"Wait here, I'll call the doctors." Before he could leave, I grabbed his hand.

"H-Hyung, c-can I p-please ask you s-something?"

"What is it?"

"B-Before you you go and call the doctors, c-can you hand me a p-pen and paper? Please?"

Guanlin heaved a deep sight before he frantically searched for the things I requested. He hastily took a pen and paper out from the bed side drawer and handed them to me.

"Stay here okay? I'll be quick." Guanlin told me as he dashed out of the room.

I looked around the dim lighted room— it's familiar white boring walls, the cacti sitting on the windowsill that I have been raising since six years ago now bearing a flower, the same old bed sheets of my bed, the beiged worn-out sofa that has been a sleeping place for Guanlin and sometimes my parents, and the small window near my bed, a place that gives me a breather whenever I felt suffocated in this small place.

These were some of the little things that accompanied me for the past 16 years, and suddenly, melancholy washed over me as I started to write on the paper slowly, taking my time.

Taking my time.

— ☆ —

i had a very hard time writing the last few chapters since I'm a bit sad about this book ending :"(

+ so y'all, if im gonna publish a WINNER Jinwoo fanfiction, would you read it? (pls stan them)