Polarized | Finn Hudson

Getting Personal

But it wasn't her.

The woman looked very similar, but not quite like her. I let go of the breath I was holding for what felt like an hour and turned back to the class, who had tried to pretend like they weren't thinking it was her either. The bell rang as normal, and I grabbed my book bag and walked with Finn. As I did so, I let my mind wonder off to peak at everyone's outside life around me. Mercedes and Amelia shared a small kiss while walking and talking about how Mercedes is trying to find a job.  I turned and saw Sam, who was rushing and saying "I'm on my way, don't answer the door for anyone." Into the phone quickly as he then bolted out the doors. Brittany was slightly next to us, walking the same pace as she slid her work shirt over her uniform and smiled at me with tiredness showing under her eyes.

Everyone had something going on in their lives no matter what, but once we were all at school, we had to push it away, smile, and prepare our brains for knowledge we may never use again. And the fact that we all judged each other here without knowing what's actually going on is horrible and disgusting. I looked up at Finn, who in instinct looked back down at me and smiled, causing mine to appear as well. I knew what was going on with us, and I knew how I could help fix our situations, at least sometimes. But if I knew what everyone else was thinking or going through, could I help them in any way?

*************

I had been in thought for the rest of the day. I wanted to know if Mercedes had potential interviews lined up for a stable job, or if whoever Sam was talking to was okay, or if Brittany is taking work as easy as she could since she was so exhausted. It was creepy and invasive in a sense, but to think of it, all of us have gone these past school years together in Glee club being close and all, but we truly don't know everyone's true stories. We hear little glimpses of it every once in a while. We all try to be here for each other, but how can we when we all only know the school version of each other?

I used my sleeves as sweater-paws to hold the hot chocolate Finn had made. I was staring at the cover of a magazine that had Grant Gustin on the front of it. I wasn't gushing over him, I was just so deep in thought, I couldn't even peel my eyes off of what I was looking at. "I guess I finally have some competition?" Finn caught me as he walked over and sat next to me on the couch. "Yep." I softly laughed and rolled my shoulders. "What's on your mind? Your cheeks are red." He side smiled and faced me. "I've just been thinking. We've gone all throughout high school pretending to be fine at school. But I just want to know how everyone truly is, what's going on in their lives, you know?" I asked before sipping at the marsh-mellow fluff. "You truly do care a lot about everyone." He smiled and kissed my forehead, then pulling me in carefully to lay some what against him.

"I know, but I wanna know who everyone is before we all leave high school. I want to be here for everyone and I cant when everyone is just met with masks at school." "Well people do that because they're scared or insecure. There's a lot of serious things people are going through and people will make fucked up statements and unneeded points about them." Finn signed, flattening his freshly washed hair down some. "That's just it. Everyone may feel scared or insecure, and I don't want anyone leaving high school feeling that way. It isn't right." I frowned to myself. "We can't force everyone just to spill their whole life out. There's some things they don't want to say, or can't say."

"But what if they sing the parts they want to share?" I sat up.

The next day, I wondered into the classroom late, and Mr. Schuester noticed because no one ever is unless it's bad. "Is everything alright?" He asked from his desk. "Actually, no." I looked at him and everyones eyes focused on me. I looked at Finn who gave me a reassuring nod. "We're all about leave highschool. Four months. In four months, what's going to happen in your life? Something will."

"We all have gone these last three years to school and tried to be normal." I chuckled at the word normal. "But I know deep down, you guys may be struggling, hurting, or losing some sort of fight. I care about you guys, and I know we use this class to compete and express ourselves, but I know not everything get's heard. And I know its not fair to see others coping easily while you're falling behind with whatever. We all need to be here for each other more. So this week, I'm taking control." I looked at Mr. Schuester. He smiled and folded his arms. "Go ahead."

"For this week's assignment, I want you guys to find a song that represents a glimpse into your life. It's okay to hold certain stuff back, but put as much of your story out there as you can. Let your voice be heard. Don't hold the grief against yourself after we graduate and say that you never got the support you needed, because this week it starts. Nobody did anything wrong, but we need to start helping each other at this time. I'm sorry if you guys have went through stuff years ago that we couldn't help you with, but now we are going to start. I care about you guys and love you too much to hide what's happening. Everything is personal, I get that. Let this be an outlet to get help with what you can get help with."