camila cabello • one-shots & imagines ♡

he's not you

"I'm not sorry I loved you."

-

This one-shot is something different. It's a vent on behalf of how I feel/felt. If this genuinely resonates with you, let me know. We're all here for each other, that's what this world should be about. I've lost and I've loved and I've hurt so much in such a short amount of time, but that's okay to feel that way. You grow. Life is not about your popularity, or your looks, or your talents- life is about learning. Just know that I love you and I care for you and I think everything will be okay. Romance is never going to be on anybody's side because it's a risk, and everybody should know that before they commit. The euphoria in a relationship can only last so long.

Parts of this story didn't occur in my life, but it's a way for me to express the emotions I wanted to convey.

Be strong. Get lots of Kleenex if you would like to. Reading sad shit makes me feel better later on.

Love, Em. :) xx

/

Camila lazily drew small patterns on the surface of your arm. You lay peacefully asleep, your body faced forward towards the small latin girl. The two of you, bare-chested with ruffled hair, lay tangled in the soft, silk bedsheets. The two of you had made a choice the night before- to forget about the outside world and to focus on one another. The worries they had were little to nothing- it was just them, the bed, and the entire night to spend however they wanted.

That didn't change the fact that you knew what Camila had been thinking prior to having sex and later on. In the back of her mind, Camila would try to convince herself that being with another girl was not how she planned for her future, nor did her family. Well, her parents really paid no mind to the issue, in fact, they accepted it. The fault was the rest of Camila's family- they would disown her, and never speak to her again. To you, that meant it was okay to be together, because the family that Camila lived with wouldn't banish her or discourage her in any way.

Camila thought differently.

She wanted to be her definition of normal. She wanted to love a man, but every time she was around you, she felt better than normal. She felt that in your arms was where she belonged. Her mind and her choices were all so conflicted, and you knew that. When you leant in to give her a hug, she'd tense up at the contact but she'd melt into it just as quickly. When you kissed her cheek, Camila would blush timidly but push the strong feeling away so she wouldn't be so obvious.

At first, to you, you thought everything was okay. You thought last night was a night of passionate, sexy love making. It was bold, lustful, and it was paced so the two of you could have your way with one another. It was time for the both of you to mix your hot breaths, your flavors, your moans... A time to show how the two of you felt.

A time that you thought was perfect.

When you woke up the following morning, you had expected to meet the eyes of the one person you trusted your whole life with. Only, you were met with cold sheets, you were met with a sudden shiver shooting up your spine as the blanket that covered half of your body was sprawled elsewhere. You were devastated. The thought that Camila would leave without a say scared you. Originally, you thought nothing of it, you thought she had a reasonable explanation and that she'd talk to you about it later. That was until the next morning, on a Monday, that you moved to greet your best friend and behind-the-curtains lover. Camila simply sent a small smile your way, but she didn't make a move to spend her time to talk to you– like she always had, even before romance was on either of your minds.