Quick a/n sorry this chapter is so wordy and poetically descriptive, I'm aware it drags on quite a lot and takes a lot of time just to describe some thing as well simple as a cigarette compared to how I usually describe it in Diana's point of view. It's just that because this chapter is from Grayson's point of view I'd like to write it how he would write it and experience it, changing the writing style as well. It just shows graysons character in more detail and I will be doing this more often too, I hope.
But hey, let me know if you like this style because I do and would totally do it more often if people enjoyed it. I just feel you guys like it when it's straight to the point and not with heaps of descriptions.
October 2nd. Grayson Dolan.
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I turned to Diana and Shawn -maybe hoping for some help- but instead was met with empty seats. The two had fled before the chants of the diner could even die down remotely. The atmosphere softened and I hung my head in my hands. I was mortified, So was ethan and Toby, so was the whole diner; who at the time were watching intensely like it were a dramatic soap opera, hunched over grabbing onto the backs of the chairs in front of them, waiting for the next words to be uttered. They weren't. Nothing was said. Nothing was done. Instead I inhaled the tension and exhaled the fear, letting it slowly disperse into the air and seep into everyone else's lungs, the end result being me fear free and everyone else trembling.
My stomach crunched up and so did my fists, I was gagging for something to rest between my fingers and slide between my lips. I loved the taste of the poison, the flames satisfied my inner devil and my lungs begged for the danger of the smoke. My body craved the way the smoke danced along my lips and how beautifully painful it felt to breathe it in. I wanted nothing my more than to light the poison and inhale it.
And as though he was channelling my thoughts into his brain, Ethan looked at me and pushed his eyebrows down towards his eyes and pressed his lips together, tight. As if he was warning me not to. But I did. I always did what I was warned not to.
I pushed up, away from my chair and Ethan pushed away from his and towards me, away from my girlfriend. They were right, I should have broken up with her. But I always did what I was warned not to. So I stayed with the narcissistic bitch out of pure spite.
The tingle on my lips was glorious, and the smoke that seeped into my lungs was even better, I felt alive even though I was so close to death. A step away from life is one closer to death, and I wanted nothing more than to edge close to that death, but never close enough to reach it. So I dropped the cigarette and stamped it out, in fear of getting one step too close and almost losing my balance and slipping into the controlling hands.
"Grayson."
I sighed and pulled my hand to my head, scratching the tufts of hair on top of it. I looked down, two large feet in scruffed up converse looked back up at me and I smiled.
"Hey, Noah." I removed my shoe from on top of the cigarette, revealing its crushed up corpse. I shivered, the cold ran down my spine, tickling the hairs and causing them to stand up proudly.
"You shouldn't be doing that." Not once did my eyes move from the ground to his face, yet I could feel it was red and his words were shaky. He's been crying.
"You ought to thank D for what she did back there." I told him, placing my hands behind my back, pushing them against the wall with a disregard for the face they would be grazed.
"No, I shouldn't. We need to talk Grayson." And that's when I looked up. The tone in his voice scared me and when I saw his face it terrified me more. Cuts all over and bruises.
"Oh god, he's back isn't he." I didn't want to say it but I did. Always referring to Chris as he, maybe we were afraid somebody would hear, maybe we were afraid Diana would hear, maybe we were afraid by the sheer mention of his name, he would appear and we wouldn't admit it but we knew it would not end well.
A simple nod with the shake of his head, his light brown hair bouncing around roguely.
"For gods sake!" I screamed and kicked the wall I leant on, my foot aching with pain afterwards. I thought for a moment, about how strong he was and how much he hurt Diana. I thought about how he nearly killed her and probably would, if given the chance. I thought about how unsafe she was. Did she know?
"She doesn't know yet, Grayson. And you're not going to tell her. His father payed the judge who was ruling the court case off, he got an insanely good lawyer and has gotten off free. But his father has some private business to see to in London for a month and a few days so he's going with him, thank god. We have until November 17th to figure this out, to get Diana safe."
I nodded very slowly, taking everything in, all we had to do was keep her safe and that was what I was going to do, even if it was the last thing I did.
I reached into my pocket slowly, exhaling in relief when my fingers grasped the cardboard box, I pulled it out and slid open the lid, revealing two Dirty cigarettes, covered in dirt from my pocket. I put two fingers around one and placed it in the palm of his hand, taking the last and placing it in between my lips. I lit my own, the warmth from the lighter comforting my cold hands, then Noah's.
And we sat outside, on the cold wet ground, inhaling our poison. We brainstormed a plan to keep our best friend safe, feeling a little cold and a little broken. A little scared. Our lungs felt a little tired and a little sore. A little scared. Our heads felt a little worn and a little sleepy. A little scared.
And our hearts felt a little heavy and a little weak.
It is now that I have come to the conclusion that we were not a little scared but terrified,
