Little by Little

Little by Little -Ch. 9-

Little by Little

Ch. 9

-Jen-

Where u at?

Once again, it was Nicolette Pierre. I sighed and just wanted to throw my phone away. It was a face palm moment where I wished I hadn’t asked Nicolette out. I just wanted to go out with her so I could get closer to Park.

It felt like it wasn’t yesterday that I coincidently ran into her, of all places, at a cemetery. It had been a four year thing that Grandma passed away. Of course, every day I had missed her. She was the only person who actually cared about me. She was involved in every part of my life. She saw my tears and calmed me down every time I had been down. She knew my feelings.

My parents didn’t care about any of that.

I remember that day in 8th grade. I had told Grandma I had a feeling. She asked me what kind of feeling was it. I told her about Park. I told her, whenever I saw her, my heart skipped all around and I could easily smile. I could feel freedom inside me. Whenever I saw her, she looked like the happiest person around. She was happy, and it made me happy. I thought about her every night and I couldn’t stop it.

Grandma had told me it was a thing called love. I asked her what it was about. Love. It was more than like. You could do anything with love. It wasn’t wrong to love someone because it was your feelings; no one else’s.

I told Grandma that a dance was coming up. She told I had to ask her to the dance. I could tell Park, then, of the feelings of love I felt for her. Grandma told me what I had to say so she wouldn’t think I was joking. This was a one chance thing, Jen, Grandma said to me.

On that day, I gathered up my friends and told them what I was going to do. They all agreed and wished me luck. I guess the news got around fast. I had asked favors of where her classes were and this had to be perfect. I had dressed extra that day to make me look more serious. I couldn’t let my first time asking a girl to a dance be ruined.

I found out she was in physical education class. Everyone gathered around and I told Park I wanted to take her to the dance. My heart broke at her answer. It was my first time asking a girl out and I get rejected. Without thinking, I made everyone hate her because I felt humiliated. I didn’t want anyone else! I wanted Park Marshalls.

From then on, I continued to watch her. I watched everything from the side and noticed what little things she did. I didn’t want anyone near her because I wanted only me there for her. I didn’t want any other guy going up to her and she accepts him. I couldn’t allow that. I cared for her more than myself.

From then on, I had been in love with Park.

Now, I had been lenient and let Reese Pierre near her. My anger spiked when I ever saw them together. If that was me, I only thought. I let myself be cool though. I had matured now. No matter how much my heart longs for Park, she’ll never forgive me. I had caused a mess to her high school years. I knew she hated me. She told me herself. She didn’t know how that sent my heart in my own grave.

Now, I was with Nicolette. She probably thought I was done with her. I wasn’t though. I was going to get her back. Whatever it takes, no matter the numbers of heartbreaks I’ll get, I’ll win her over. She’s the only one for me. I couldn’t let her escape from me again.

I may be in a relationship, but my heart was taken a long time ago.

No other girl could compare with Park. She’s the girl I’ll only and ever love.

Now, my plan was to be with Nicolette. Whatever chances I had, I had to talk to Park. She would have to listen to me. I couldn’t let her know that I only dated Nicolette because I wanted her. I could ruin her friendship with them. Once I get friendlier with Park, I’ll break up with Nicolette. I’ll lay it low for awhile and start talking to Park again. I’d have to do that.