Blameless ✔

Chapter 26: ❝I'm truly, truly sorry❞

Chapter 26: ❝I'm truly, truly sorry❞

♡Evelyn's POV♡

I twirled the fountain pen in my hand absent-mindedly as my unspoken thoughts ran amuck.

It had been three days since Mark had come back to school but he had yet to say anything to me or at least apologize for the incident that had occurred last week but I couldn't bring myself to break my silence on the matter either so I supposed there was no use in being hypocritical. However, what he had told me that night on our date made me wonder if I should just muster up the courage to push myself in order to speak to him because I didn't want him thinking that I didn't care. Hearing those words the first time really stung and I never wanted to experience that emotional turmoil ever again.

"Evelyn."

The hushed call of my name snapped me out of my thoughts as I became conscious of my surroundings.

"Oh, I'm sorry Nathan," I apologized, letting my gaze drop quickly to my Math's textbook after realizing that I had been staring. "What were you saying?"

I heard him laugh quietly in amusement. "Well, it doesn't matter now."

The two of us were seated in the public library situated in the centre of town. I had originally planned on coming here by myself, as usual, to get a bit of study done but Nathan had insisted on tagging along and I couldn't say I completely hated his company. He had previously been watching me work and only got up to go search for a book to focus on after I had annoyedly told him to do so.

Tilting my chin upwards, my vision finally became aware of the novel he had been reading the whole time.

"Is that Forbidden Love?" I inquired silently as to not bother anyone in the library while my face lit up at the familiar cover.

He nodded, smiling fondly as he unnecessarily flipped the intricate cover to his range of sight. "Yes, I've actually read this book before, as well as the sequel."

A smile formed itself on my lips to imitate his in admiration. "Really? So did I."

He chuckled. "You sound surprised."

Shrugging, I responded, "well, I've never really been acquainted with someone that shared similar interests with me so it's only normal for me to be surprised."

He hummed in understanding.

Nathan had already been informed about my life in high school and how much worse it had been in the past since he had kept pestering me with questions, wanting an explanation for why Blake did what he did the day he had knocked me out in front of the locker area. I was forced to tell him the whole story because the answer to his question wouldn't have made sense if I had done otherwise.

"I actually favour one specific quote from the novel," he spoke, flipping through the pages as if trying to find the the number with the quote but I knew instantly that he didn't need the confirmation when he easily uttered, "my heart tells me this is the best and greatest feeling I have ever known. But my mind knows the difference between wanting what you can't have and wanting what you shouldn't want. And I shouldn't want you."

I nodded, agreeing with him completely while figuratively tossing my Math's textbook aside to get the most out of a conversation I didn't even know I would have, let alone needed.

"I love that quote too," I said, the corner of my eyes wrinkling slightly as my smile reached its maximum. "The question I'm about to ask you is very controversial but what are your thoughts on Ed that invested all of his time trying to win over the princess?"

He didn't need to think about it. 

"I envy him."

I raised my eyebrows slightly, wanting to hear more about his thoughts that always appeared to be enclosed as he had found great pleasure in listening to me as opposed to talking about himself. "Why's that?" I asked, sincerely curious.

"Because although there was a very low chance that he - a mere knight - could obtain the love of the princess already married to her prince, he still tried and neglected his status in order to woe her. Obviously, it didn't turn out the way he had expected but he loved her so much that he settled on being friends even though he had to suffer the burden of watching her fall deeper and deeper in love with her spouse. The story was beautiful and showcased the desperation of solace and bravery. Truly an amazing novel."

I couldn't help but stare at him with warm approval, feeling the weird urge to clap but deciding against it as I asked jokingly, "where have you been all my life?"

He didn't say anything and just stared at me with his mouth slightly agape.

"It's nice finally having someone to have intellectual conversations with," I continued, liking this strange replica of relief that had flooded my body but I believed it more so to be happiness and excitement - the bubbly, inextinguishable feeling one would experience very often as a kid.

"So, you're saying our conversations weren't intellectual?"

To say that I was surprised at the voice would be an embarrassing lack of a better word. What I should've said was that I was about to fall out of my chair and land flat on my face because that sentence would've served as being extraordinarily superior.

Turning around, my eyes widened dramatically when I saw who was towering over me wearing a moody facial expression to complement the emotion that had leaked out of his voice when he had spoken.

"Mark..."

He didn't even spare Nathan a glance when he had used his hand to pull me up from the wooden chair by my wrist. He then used his other to dexterously pile my bag with the books and stationary once laid out meticulously on the brown desk that possessed a material similar to that of cardboard.

"We're leaving," was all he said before dragging me out of the library with more than ten insignificant, curious eyes escorting us on our journey out.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

"Mark!" I exclaimed, trying to twist my hand out of his punishing grip as he pulled me out into the warm breeze - a faraway greeting from the Summer season. When he finally relaxed his grip, I threw his hand off and stepped away with my eyes screaming disapprobation.

"And just what do you think you're doing?" I questioned, my anger flaring as I spoke.

He didn't say anything because the next minute I was being shoved up against the hard, brick wall of the library, the noise of the impact sounding almost simultaneously with my backpack that had hit the ground after he had uncaringly let it drop from his shoulder. Before I could protest to his unacceptable behaviour that only further heightened my rage, he completely prevented it by forcefully smashing his lips against mine with craving identifiable in the wordless contact.

My legs became weak and my arms and lips greedily acquired a mind of their own.

He eventually pulled away, leaving me to desperately inhale my breath and sanity as my cheeks flushed under the golden sun that gave his skin a nice, ethereal glow.

"I'm sorry," he spoke through a slightly prolonged sigh. "I'm truly, truly sorry."

That was all you had to say and yet it took so long, I thought sadly as I stared at my lover with heartbreak, forcefully portraying itself through my glassy eyes.

"I'll explain."

"Explain what, Mark?" I asked, not missing a beat.

He seemed to be taken aback by my outspoken question as his eyes widened abruptly before they quickly returned to their original shape and he sighed; winded.

He uttered one word but unsurprisingly, that word kind of made up for... everything.

"Everything."

-

Damn it, Evelyn.

Girl, why didn't you just slap him?