Everything Isn't What It Always Seems

Chapter Nine

Just going to say now, there's not may more chapter left now. Enjoy.

Chapter Nine-

10/2/2014 at 4pm. That's what the note from the psychiatrist said. I had really talked myself out of going but for everyone's sake I knew I would go. I didn't have to talk about things, I knew I wouldn't anyways. I could never talk to a complete stranger. I wouldn't trust them. Me and Aiden had skipped school so we could spend time together before I went to the horrible place. I stayed abit longer on purpose, teasing him as he went to kiss me. I wouldn't of thought that I was anyone's type especially not Aidne's type. He made me happy. People go on about how they're in love with someone for them to break up the next week and move on, but I must say Aiden has stolen my heart. When I turned up to the appointment I was already 20 minutes late. The psychatrist stared at me with an angry look on his face, his glare made you feel ashamed.

"Ellia, you were purposely late. Don't deny it, I could see you with some boy at the entrance, now that you've finally turned up we can begin"

I sighed. I sat on a chair opposite him with my arms crossed looking annoyed because I was annoyed. Who was he to talk to me like that. He started talking about how he's worked with kids who've done the same thing as me for years. I wasn't interested. I just wanted to leave this hell of a place. I put headphones in my ear which he didn't seem to notice. I wondered how long it would take for him to realize I was gone if I did leave. I didn't know my way out of this hospital anyways so there was no way I could escape. Right now I was craving for a tab, my mum had found out that I smoked she was abit arguementitive but I pointed out it would help with stress. And right now I was stressed. As I got out my seat to escape he looked up at me.

"Where are you going, we haven't finished yet"

"I need a tab, can I not have one?"

"First of all you should've just asked, second yes you can but I'll have to wait outside for you"

Well crap, that goes my plan of escaping. We walked outside the building in complete silence. As I lit up my tab he touched my arm. I looked at him as if he were a small insect that I'd love to stand on.

"What do you think you're doing, get your hands of me"

"Now we're making progress, you don't like being touched of strangers or people you're not comfortable with, I noticed when you were flirting with that boy earlier but when he touched you kinda of shivered"

I turned my self away from, I hate to admit it he was right.

"Something's happened lately, that's why your angry"

"How do you know I'm angry?"

"Me and your mums spoke so I got a brief idea what's made you feel suicidal"

"So now people are talking about me, shouldn't be surprised there people always do"

After I had my quick tab I walked back to the room, maybe things would get better. He wanted to know my life story basically and I started with how Liam got bullied, I suppose that's when things got out of hand. while I talked the psychiatrist took notes. I told him everything well almost everything I just missed out the bit where I had got raped. I just didn't want to talk about it, it was forever haunting me. It seemed like it was the end of the session so I had to go home now face my mum. Hopefully she didn't realise I skipped school today. The thought that I was in trouble didn't scare me, it used to.

School was the same old rubbish. My behaviour was apparently disgraceful they had to have a meeting with my mum because I had finally lost my temper with the bullies to the point where I smacked one of the girls head off a table. When my English teacher finally separated us I nearly swung at the teacher. I had to wait for my mum at the office and then I had to have a meeting. They told my mum I was on my last warning before I get threw out for good instead of my mum shouting at me she defended me.

"How do you think she's going to react she tried killing herself because she thought she was worthless but these stupid bitches in your school are to blame"

My mum dragged me out the office and we left. I couldn't help smiling, behind her brave face there was something that distressed and I didn't find out what it was until we got home. Aunt Kate was round with Dan. I almost ran out the room when I saw him. He still had that evil smirk on his face and that really annoyed me.

"Marie what's this about"

"I think, in fact I know Dan done something to Ellia before she tried to kill herself didn't you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, you broke my good girl. You've wrecked her life now. You stupid boy, you pervert"

"Don't call my boy a pervert, he clearly had nothing to do with why Ellia wanted to end her life"

"So he avoided her when she was in hospital, she can't stand to be in the same room as him. I know what you done to her, Rapist"

I should've guessed my mum would've know what's happened to me, it's in their nature to do so. What I didn't think was how my aunt Kate would react to this. My mum and Kate were having an argument all I got out of it were false accusations and your child isn't an angel. I couldn't bare no more, so my aunt Kate wouldn't believe it, I didn't think she would now that I thought about it, that's her child who done that and if your child does bad things you don't want to believe that it's true. I left the house and nobody noticed not even Dan and I was relieved, I was scared in case he tried to do it again. That's what hurts the most, not knowing who you can trust. I found myself knocking on Caitlin's door, I decided she should know now that my mum found out too. We sat in her room eating Oreos we laughed about me hitting the girls head even though she pretended she wasn't, she was proud of me. I told her about why I tried to kill myself and her eyes widened with surprise and she was crying again. I didn't want to go home tonight but I knew I must so when I heard my aunts car pulling away from the house I went home. When my mum saw me she gave me a tight hug and I didn't want to let go. Atleast 2 people knew and believed me about what happened but it stung when I realised my aunt Kate didn't. My mum phones the psychiatrist and told them about me being raped. Seems like my appointment was rushed forward to tomorrow. I didn't feel like talking about it, not yet but for things to get better I knew I had to talk about it. I had to be brave like my mum. And brave I tried.