Warning: Sensitive content!! Cutting, depression, etc.. (Literally my first angst, SO DON'T JUDGE MEH!)
"C'mon Tom! Just try to forget". "It's not that easy Edd! You just don't get it.. It still hurts".. "Well I'm pretty sure being a jerk to all of us isn't the best solution either".. Edd pointed out.
Now, it's been a couple months since Tord died, and it hit Tom worse then anyone else. So he poured all his feelings in his diary. The diary that he kept hidden from everyone, except Edd. The only person he trusted was Edd. Matt wouldn't understand what Tom was going through. And Tord was dead. It just stressed Tom out because he didn't know what these feeling were.
Tom loved Tord, a lot! Tom would have the most unbearable feelings and emotions for him. Resulting in Tom cutting himself. Tom did it every now and then, slashing his wrist with the sharp object. Edd didn't know Tom did this, no one did. And it was going to stay that way. Of course Tom did write it in his diary though.
He could never love you..
You're a freak!
And an asshole..
You can't do anything right..
Tom slammed his fist on his desk out of fury, tears prickled at his eyes. Tom would lecture himself, he didn't know why but it made him feel better. Then the feeling of the truth would hit him later.
Empty bottles of Smirnoff scattered all over the floor, Tom didn't eat, he didn't even sleep.
"C'mon Tom! Come out! You can't just drink all your problems away"! Edd banged on the door.
Edd was right, but Tom was a stubborn one. Tom would also cut himself because he felt that it was stupid to love someone like Tord, he was too perfect for him. And dead.
{Tom's P.O.V}
It's been stressful after Tord died.. My dad hadn't even called him back yet... In years. And my mother.. Oh yeah.. She's gone too. Why was everyone in my life disappearing slowly? Was Edd next? My heart shattered, after Tord's death it's been a fucking nightmare! MY LIFE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE! My dad, alcoholic asshole.. My mom, abusive and crazy.. Tord, dead..
Why do I care all of a sudden?
I tried to kill him!
And know I regret it..
Everyone makes mistakes.. Right?
I walked closer to the rope, lining my head up with the entrance.
I guess I'll see Tord..
In hell..
.....
Darkness
My cheeks drain of blood
My feet kick violently
So ThIs HeLl, WHAT A SIGHT-
I'm not really good at writing angst, I'm not really a depressed or depressing person... ;-;
