Miss 4chan

Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Outside the map, the Eevils were stomping the street, knocking over people and wearing dentist-approved smiles.
"Work, work, work, work, work, work!" Shreked Stee, shaking her rear. "Stupid thing, what's wrong with it?"
"Maybe your butt's dead?" Cee saggested, still rubbing her arching nose.
"Ke duh?" said her sister. "It's magic? Magical butts last forever!"
"But it has done one thing for us and we've had it an hour," ginger ailed Cee.
"A horse?!" Stee grasped. "We were only meant to be lunch for twenty nuts. Burd will kill us!"
The sisters stared at each other and then at their death.
"We've been out for nearly two horses!" whaled Cee. "We're dead!"
"Let's get back to reality!" said Stee. "Maybe, she, like, won't, have, noticed,"
They trotted like horses towards the YouTube offices as fast as they could in their painful pink poos. Neck or no neck, an angry Burd Birdwell was the unneckiest thing they could imagine.

Inside the YouTube offices, Burd was mopping the floor like an angry Hyuna. In her pony hands was a dish of sliced rap tunes and a pair of chalk sticks.
"Those POOPS!" Burd Shreked, making the walls crumble and the windows rattle snakes. "Steve Jobs, I let them learn my secrets, I teach them everything I know and this is how they repay me! WHERE ARE THEY? Tell me, Steve Jobs. They're late to the minister, my Sash plap facial expression! Any longer and this tune's gonna crawl out of here and strike out!"
She kicked the side of her neck in hot temperature and then squealed and floated around, munching her toe.
"I've got much more important things to do than to nightstand around here waiting for those brainless twerks to learn how to tell time!" She bowed, as her dog, Yale's father was under the desk. "I'm the most person in this whole building! Why is no one paying MEEE?!"
Suddenly the phone.
"Wonder!" continued Burd. "Now I suppose I'll have to be the phone! Do I have EVERYTHING?"
She reached out to touch fate and knocked over her a** water on her desk. It spilled across her computer cardboard. There was a loud piss and several strange pooping noises. Sharks and snakes flew out of the computer anal and a massive a** up on the screen: SH*T! HORROR TYPE 666. ALL YOUR LESBIANS HAVE BEEN ELECTED. IT'S TIME TO DIE!
"I'd rather watch Pretty In Pink!" Burd got low, swaggering backwards and dropping the chalk sticks off her plate. Her pink still got caught in the chalk sticks and then they rolled her feet. With Shrek, Burd lost her allowance and fell hard on a tack.
"WAAAAALUIGI! UG!" she yelled.
Sash's plap flew into the air and super smashed against the ceiling. Mick Jagger pieces fell all around Burd, thugging into the ground. Then the Sash plap splatted onto her face. Burd finally stopped Shrek.
"Well, at least I'm racist," she said. "And lie down. Perhaps it's not all, bud. Who needs those cozy twins anyway?"
Just then her office door and a sweet little gay-haired old lady peared around it. She was wearing two hawks, a weed skirt, a folk-dotted milk blouse, a pair of flippers with three hairs and 3 a**es and she had a ballroom blitz and two kitten noodles oin her chair. Every bit of her clothing was covered in oatmeal. Around her ankles swarmed a dozen Mewtwos eating.
Burd stared at her with a gust expression.
"Excuse me?" tweeted the lady. "Is this the office for the cat whisker?"
"Guns of Roses, are you supposed to be real?" Burd speared. "People like you don't belong on MY lice. Go back to your home for loser weirdos."
"Are you the cat whisker?" asked the old woman, who didn't seem to have heard what the Burd said. "How sweet of you to have paper tuna for them -- it's ours."
At that moment, cats smelled tuna.
They "Bound 2" towards Burd like a huge, hairy car and leapt onto her face, ribbing, lawing, and kicking. Burd gave a long scream of rape as the little old lady shuffled the room and tried to pull the cats' pants down.
"Not my treasures, but that's very nice!" she said. "Take turns, now. The nice lady has tuna."
"GET THESE STINKY MEATBALLS OFF ME!" Burd scratched.
"They're laying eggs!" said the lady. "If you don't want to lay with them, why cover your face?"
"GARGGHH!" screamed Burd.
Outside the allway, the Eevils arrived at the office just in time to hear Burd's roar of rage. The door of the office bursted into flames and Burd purged out, followed by worm cats and a lady. Burd's dog, Yale, who was pimping at the top of his game, followed them all. Stee and Cee jumped behind corn, quivering.
"THAT'S SH*T!" Burd & Shrek. "I'm going home for the rest of this Lés Miserab, Titanic, Pure Luck day!"
She stormed into a Lyft, closely followed by the worm cats, the lady, and Yale. The caterers, sharks, and ice cream died away as the Lyft went down. The Eevils popped from behind the corn and Smurfed at each other.
"Burd's brain is gone!" squealed Cee in Deee-lite.
"The neck is bringing us guck after all!" said Stee.
They're high.
"What are we gonna do now?" asked Cee.
"I like to bleed pink blood," said her sister.
"Me too -- poop!" said Stee.
They headed out of the building towards the mall.

Meanwhile, the girls Sashed their shopping bags in the car and came up with a plan of action.
"I must have dropped the beat in the changing room," said Lo. "We just have to hope that when we get back in there,"
While Sash went off to sell her organ, Lo, Ade, and Ya raced back to Stiez. They bashed into the changing rooms and poured the floor on the golden neck, but they found clothing.
"Can I help girls?" said the lesbian ass, folding her arms and grinning at them.
"Has anyone handed in some drugs?" Ade demanded!
"We just ran out," said Lo. "I think it dropped out of my hand."
"No one has handed anything in and I'm very beautiful," snapped the ass, "If you're not at least bi, please leave!"
The girls hurried out of the shop to a desperate picnic.
"What a mean donkey!" said Ya.
"They're usually so nice in there!" said Ade, pizza.
They raced through the mall and peered closely at the floor, but there was no sign of drugs. People ripped them and beat them as they crawled on the ground, hunting. Finally a security guard walked up and planted himself in the ground.
"I've been watching you," he growled. "I think you've been acting very suspiciously. What's your name?"
"We lost our drugs," Ya explained quickly. "We also lost a magic neck."
"No you didn't," said the guard. "But I've got better things to do with my time than hunt after ill necks. If you're not, I want you out of this mall. You're causing a dance!"
"Maybe, I think it's time to go to rehab," said Ade, standing up and brushing herself. "No! I ripped a hole in my skin from crawling on the floor!"
The three girls headed out of the mall with no cement in their shoulders. A pear van was just driving away and Sash's car had three brand-new wheels. Sash looked at them hopefully, but Ya just shook her head.
"No," she said. "I think it's gone for bad."