Atsushi- *opens door-chan* Guys I'm going somewhere with Akutagawa right now and I can't take Dazai.
Yosano- what do you mean?
Atsushi- he depends on me too much and I can't take him to this mission!
Kunikida- hell no I ain't taking care of him.
Atsushi- pweeezz *pouts*
Ranpo- *sighs* fine.
Tanizaki- where is he anyways?
Dazai- bitch I'm here! *hanging onto Atsushi's leg*
Kenji- what are you doing Dazai?
Dazai- I'm not letting Atsushi go somewhere with that emo hoe! He has rabies!!!!
Atsushi- Dazai, can I trust you to stay here with the rest of the Agency?
Dazai- *shakes head and pouts* nnnooo
Kunikida- come here you bastard *gets Dazai off of Atsushi's leg*
Akutagawa- *pops up behind Atsushi* you ready?
Atsushi- yeah...just let me tell them something, guys don't let him out and make sure he goes to bed at six.
Yosano- yeah yeah just go already
Atsushi- okay then bye Osamu!
Dazai- don't leave me here!
Akutagawa- *smirks* Atsushi is in good hands Dazai~ *closes door*
Dazai-noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! He took Atsushi away from me!
Ranpo- Dazai can you shut up? Just sit down on The Chair.
Dazai- *shakes* n-no not The Ch-chair!
Yosano- The Chair *points at a pink children's chair*
Dazai- okay *sits on The Chair*
2 seconds later
Everyone- *asleep*
Tanizaki- wtf? *yawns*
Ranpo- are you behaving like a good suicidal boy and sit- WHAT THE HELL WHERE IS HE?! *finds The Chair empty*
Kenji- There he is! *points at Dazai who was halfway out the window*
Dazai- *Hollers out the window while flapping his arms like a retarded bird* ATSUSHI, TAKE ME WITH YOU!
Yosano- Fuck! *pulls Dazai back inside*
Kunikida- tape him to a chair.
Naomi- *tapes Dazai to a chair and tapes his mouth shut*
Dazai- mmhmhmm! *moves around*
Kunikida- you're not going anywhere. Atsushi said that you had to stay here.
Dazai- *magically chews on the tape and spits it out* fine, but can I at least go to the restroom?
Yosano- you ain't fooling us FOOL.
Dazai- please, then make Ranpo come with me.
Tanizaki- okay...
Ranpo- *takes off tape and drags Dazai to the restroom* make it quick.
Dazai- I will *gets into the stall*
Ranpo- *hears him pee and waits*
Dazai- *still peeing for three minutes*
Ranpo- hey Bandage Whore, are you finish?
Door stall-kun- *opens*
Ranpo- *finds two water bottles spilling into the toilet and sees the window above the toilet wide open*.........shit.
To be continued.
YOU ARE READING
BSD ON CRACK
FanfictionOnce the world was a rotten hell, but now heros from the shad- Dazai- can we just cut to the scene where I find the perfect bitch to commit suicide with? Atsushi- you interrupted the intro! *sighs* Akiko- well Dazai does ruin shit every time *claps...