It didn't take long for the HarleyxTyler ship to be forgotten. Soon, the next big talk was about this big party coming up. It was Kaden's 18th birthday, and Jaxon was throwing him a huge party at one of the hotel's his family owns. Everyone in school was invited and was most likely coming to the youngest bad boy's 18th birthday party. Yes, Kaden was the youngest of the three. Just because he's the tallest, has the biggest build and is the most mature, people automatically think he's the oldest. I love the reactions of people when they find out that he's the youngest and Reece is actually the oldest.
I really didn't want to go honestly, but Kaden being my friend, I had to go. That, and the girls were dragging me to go. I already ditched the Halloween party, so I had to go to this one. Plus, this was going to be in a really awesome hotel with a casino, a swimming pool, etc. It was gonna be one of the coolest parties of the year, and we get to be treated like VIP since we're friends with the guys.
Right now, we were shopping for clothes for the party and the days after that. The party would be on Friday, and the girls and I get to stay at a room in the hotel for the days we'll be there. According to Mali, it was the perfect time to go shopping.
I really wasn't one for fashion and clothes, so it was mostly Emma and Mali shopping. Mali would pick out clothes for Emma since Emma's choice of clothing was-quote by Mali- "too pure and innocent for a party".
As I watched Mali and Emma prounce around in revealing party outfits, I can't help but feel jealous.
Emma was just so beautiful and had the face that can pull off any kind of look. She made anything look good. Mali, on the other hand, wore everything with such confidence. She may be on the chubbier side, but she embrasses that. She accepts in and wears it with confidence. Mali was who I was mostly jealous of.
I really want her confidence. I want to wear an outfit without feeling so flawed and disgusting. I wanted to be proud of who I am, flaws and everything. Mali does that so easily, and I'm jealous of her because of it. She loves herself even with all her imperfections. I could never do that.
I felt myself being poked which shook my thoughts away. Mali was standing next to me by Emma's changing room door.
"Are you sure you're not gonna buy anything?" Mali asks
"Yeah. I'm sure." I nod my head
"Okay..." She nods her head slowly. I took this as a great opportunity to ask her how she does it.
"Hey Mali?"
"Yeah?"
"How do you do it? How are you so confident in yourself?" I ask her as if it was the biggest mystery in the world. And to me, it was the biggest mysetery.
"What do you mean?" She looks at me in confusion
"It's just- you can wear anything so confidently. You're not bothered at all by any of your flaws or imperfections. You're just so...confident." I say.
"It's not everyday you see a fat girl being so confident and proud of herself." She smiles
"You're not-"
"I am. It's okay, Harley. I know I'm fat because I was born fat, and I used to be so insecure about it. I stopped eating and excercised so much just to get rid of my fat. I despised my fats so much and wanted nothing more to get rid of it. That kind of thinking led me to the hospital MULTIPLE times. My parents were so worried about me because they couldn't get through to me. They tried everything. One day, my little sister entered my room. She played the video that she had on her tablet. It showed this model who may be thick and curvy, but she was gorgeous and she was a swimsuit model too. The video was her talking about her life story. She said that beauty is beyond size." She explains
"That video just opened my eyes. I realized that day that my beauty isn't just about the outside. It's not about my size, my face, my hair or whatever. It's about how I think of myself and how I carry myself. If I go around thinking depressing thoughts about how fat and ugly I am, then obviously I believe it and I end up being fat and ugly. But if I go around thinking good things about myself like how I AM beautiful, then fuck what others think because I think I am beautiful therefore I Am Beautiful." She smiles proudly
Mali spoke with such pride in her voice. She was proud of her accomplishments and proud of herself. She accepted who she is.
She can look at herself in the mirror and tell herself that she is beautiful. Mali may not be in a relationship, but she's already receiving a lot of love from herself. And that's the most important love that one needs.
"You're amazing." Is all I can say. I hug her tightly and she hugs back. Another arm wraps around us as Emma joins in on the hug.
"You're so inspirational, Mal." Emma says
"Super." I nod my head
"Thanks, girls." Mali smiles
With Mali's help, I was able to buy clothes that I would normally never wear. I'd normally shame myself if I ever wore this, but Mali taught me something very important today.
If I think I am beautiful, then fuck what others think because I think I am beautiful therefore I AM fucking beautiful.
/////////////////////
Hi!
I just wanted to make this chapter for all those insecure people out there. I'm not the thinnest person ever. I have quite a lot of meat on my skin and most of the time it gets me down.
I created this chapter is for both you and me. It's for everyone who thinks lowly of themselves. I'm currently writing this a few minutes before 11:11, and my wish goes out to everyone reading this. I wish for you to have confidence in yourself and for you to love everything about you: flaws and all.
Be confident.
Be proud.
Be you.
YOU ARE READING
The Heart Wants What It Wants ✔️
Teen FictionIt's hard having a crush, but it's harder having a crush on the asshole bad boy. /////////// Harley Deyes doesn't have a best friend. She doesn't have a close group of friends. She doesn't have a family. She doesn't have a boyfriend. All she wants i...
