The Rebel And The Warrior.

The Mountain

I hated staying in someone's home when Bellamy was out there making sure the plan went smoothly. I sat across from Maya's father feeling a bit awkward. He had no idea what to do with me because I was a Grounder. "So, Visenya." He started trying to pronounce my name correctly. "The ground. What's it like? I must say I'm terribly curious." I chewed the roll they have me thoughtfully, choosing my words carefully. "The ground sucks." I finally answered. He blinked a couple of time and I nodded. "You guys don't know how good you have it. Walls, systems, order. You don't have to worry about someone or something coming inside in the middle of the night. You don't have to worry about the harvest for winter. The ground has none of this stuff." I said motioning to the walls and metal that conformed to the stone around us. "Why don't you just build it?" He asked and I rolled my eyes. "We don't have the materials." I told them. "Because there were none left between the Ark, the Nuke, and us." He asked. "It was either already taken or destroyed." I answered. While I was worried about outside threats, inside threats were just as bad. I hated walls. I needed air, grass, trees, something other than walls and bars. I took a deep breath shaking my leg. "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be rude, more or less." He held up a hand. "Don't worry. I understand completely. We were bleeding you." He said and I looked away as I tried to forget the memories of being bled. "Bellamy said he'd be back later. He's going to stay here, with you, for a couple of hours. I hope you don't have any hard feelings towards us, Visenya. I'm truly sorry." "Sorry won't bring back all those killed just because you want to step outside." I said looking him directly in his eyes. His eyes fell in shame. "You owe a debt and I don't know how you're going to pay. The Commander is coming to collect and she doesn't wait for anyone or anything. It could be us bleeding you next." Silence fell between us and I stood up taking my cup to the sink. "I apologize for my bluntness," I muttered facing him. "I've been told it's rather unsettling in situations like this. Its just every time I look at one of you I see loss. People I had to kill because they were Reapers, or eaten by Reapers, or dying because a Reaper hurt them. People who I never found, who might have been bloodless casks when you gave them to the Reapers. I see my people locked in cages, bleeding, dying. You might not have done it directly, but it happened." "I understand," He replied, but I had the feeling he didn't really understand like I wanted him to. "Understand this," I began as I looked at him. "When the Commander comes and she will come, she's not going to be very happy that you bled her sister and closest adviser." I warned them. Without another word I turned leaving for Maya's bedroom, shutting the door behind me and lying on her bed clutching a pillow closely as I tried to drown out the world and just exist for once. Existing felt much better than being alive. Because existing had no feelings. 

I jolted up as someone touched my hair, striking out hard. He grasped my hand jumping back so he dodged it barely. Bellamy met my eyes and I sighed heavily in an attempt to calm my racing heart. "Hey," He said looking me over. "How are you feeling?" He wondered. "I'm fine." I breathed telling an obvious lie. Bellamy held my hand. I laid back on the pillow and hopped I might get some actual, dreamless sleep. I looked down at our hands trying to decide what I was feeling. I felt... confused. He had done so much harm to me but had also shown me so much kindness and saved my life more than once. "Nothing gone wrong with the plan yet?" "Nothing I couldn't handle," He said and I couldn't help but notice the look of doubt in his eyes as he extracted his hand away from mine. Without even thinking I reached out and took it back. "I should be out there with you." I nearly argued. "You need to rest, Visenya. Maybe in a few more days." He shrugged it off. "Besides, I was hoping we could talk about something a little less... Serious." He smirked and I laughed remembering some of the nights we spent in his tent back at the Drop Ship. I moved to make room for him and Bellamy took it as he settled in. I tried to think of something, anything to talk about but all I could think of was my siblings. "You're worried about them. Rhaeneys and Thalion." It wasn't a question though. "Do you know how they are?" I wondered if he had seem them after I was taken, "Scared, worried about you. But otherwise unhurt. They are still in Tondc with Nyko waiting for your father." He said holding my hand again. "The Ice Nation if far, it will take him a few weeks to rerun for them." I sighed. They would be better off under the protection of my father. "I was freaking out too, you left all your armor and weapons at camp and I knew you were defenseless and before I knew it Lexa was in my face ordering me to come after you." I glanced over with a raised brow. "Seriously? She did that?" He nodded and I looked back up. "I didn't think she cared at all. Especially after everything that has gone down..." I trailed off trying to understand why all of a sudden she cared if I lived or died. Was it because I was her adviser? Or did she actually care for me as her sister? "How's Octavia? Still kicking Grounder ass?" I asked trying to change the subject. "You bet," He chuckled turning to look at me. His eyes were suddenly dark with something I couldn't recognize. "Visenya, I'm glad you're okay." I met his eyes wanting to tell him I really wasn't okay, that in all honesty I was anything but okay. Being bled was having a bigger effect on me than I was letting on. And being in that cage again... I shivered at the memories. "I'm glad you're okay too." Suddenly he brought me closer to him, wrapping an arm around my waist and using his other arm as a pillow while I looked at him. He was so close I could see my reflection in his chocolate brown orbs. "I'm sorry I let them hurt you." He said sincerely. "You didn't let them do anything." I nearly argued. "I couldn't get to you... Couldn't help you." He tried to apologize. "Bellamy," I breathed as I placed my hand on his cheek. "What happened to me wasn't your fault. None of this is your fault. It's the Mountain's fault." I told him seriously. "Don't you dare blame yourself for any of this." I added. "Okay." He said as he kissed my forehead and I rested my head on his shoulder.