The Games - A PP OUAT Fanfiction

Nineteen.

Time. The one thing I can't keep track of while stuck in this stupid chair. It feels like it's been years, but it might have only been months, or weeks, or days, or hours, or minutes, or even seconds. I had no clue. All I could keep track of was the voices I had heard visiting my dying body. I wondered if, since it wasn't my actual body, I would die in the real world if this sickness killed me.

I should be saying "when" it kills me. I've never been one to follow the rules, nor to listen to orders. I'm more of a rebel. So I say "if", because I have my reason to live. And that reason isn't selfish as I don't want to benefit anything from this but my friends' happiness.

****

It had been a week. One week of torture and sadness. Even Edith couldn't find the will to be even the slitest bit happy.

(Depressing.)

Everyone told Kasey that they were praying for her to live. They prayed at every meal. They knew it wouldn't really do anything, but they still did it.

Pan had been missing the entire time. Not that anyone really noticed, but then again, they didn't really care at the same time.

One night, they were telling stories about her. About Kasey. About brave things she did, about that one time she had caught Mikah and Jonathan doing it in the woods, about a dare she once did when they played Truth or Dare. That was the favorite.

She had been dared to drink a cup full of deer blood. She did it... and then she puked into the fire. That made everyone laugh wildly. The first time any of them had actually laughed in an entire week.

Pan had been listening from a distance. He laughed at the story too, but it was a sad laugh. He had taken a serious hit when Kasey went comatose; it broke him in many ways.

Sometimes he would sneak into her tent during the night and tell her stories. He knew she probably couldn't hear him, but he didn't care. He would sneak in at night and just whisper in her ear for an hour and a half. He told her about Felix, his (secretly) best friend, the Lost Boys, and Wendy Darling. And he also told her about Henry. Henry, the Truest Believer. How he was a lot like her, except he was a lot nicer. He knew she would have laughed and slapped him across the face if he actually told her that, and the thought made him laugh.

Pan missed her laugh. And her blue/green eyes. And her touch. And her smile. And her kisses. And her blushes. And how when he kissed her, her heart seemed like it was sitting beside them it was so loud. And he especially missed her attempts to be intimidating. They were adorable. He just wanted to poke her nose every time she did. Wait -

The tent flap was suddenly being opened, so he disappeared. He hated having to leave, but he didn't want to be near anyone else. He was in pain and he didn't want anyone to see.

Sanchez missed her, that stupid horse. But he liked her - he liked her spirit and her heart. He thought of her as amazing, and if she had actually asked him to ride off into the sunset with her, he would have. He was funny that way.

Pan reappeared sitting on his coffin. The cave was dark aside from the glowing plants that encircled the coffin. The fairies had kept to themselves since Kasey went under. Thinking about Kasey hurt him more than loosing his home, but he couldn't stop. She was a drug. His drug. And he was so addicted.

Pan looked at himself, an inch from death, just like Kasey. It was hard not to cry, but he was saving his tears for when she either woke up or she was gone forever. "I'm sorry, Kasey," he whispered, closing his eyes. "I'm so, so sorry. You're dying, and it's... it's all my fault. I'm sorry." He shed one tear and let it fall onto his pant leg, but he dared not cry any more. He wiped the stream away just as a light floated up to him. Stupid fairies, messing in business that isn't their own. He shooed it away, but it wouldn't leave. "What do you want?!" he yelled at it, startling it.

The tinkling of their language reached his ears. "Is she dying?"

"Yes," he said harshly, bitterly. "Yes, she is dying."

"She's not going to die."

"How do you know? You don't."

"No. But if you believe, anything's possible. You of all people should know that. You told it to all the Lost Boys when they didn't believe in themselves. You, Peter Pan, may not have a heart, but she does. She believes in you. And it's time you start believing in her." And with that, the fairy zipped off.

If only it were that easy...

****

Peter Pan is a complete asshole. I was going to tell him as soon as I woke up. Because I would wake up.

I was vaguely aware that someone was talking to me. Picies? That sounded like Picies. "We miss you," he was saying. "I miss you."

That made me smile despite the fact that I was burning up and freezing solid all at the same time.

"Edith hasn't been nearly as happy. Ellis hasn't spoke to her in a while. He mostly just stays to himself these days. Jonathan hasn't been hunting very well. Claims the weather is getting to him." He snorted. "And we haven't seen Pan in days. Huh, luckily. But what surprises me the most is that Mikah actually seems sad. Either she's just that good of an actress or she's actually sad."

That made me smile too.

"Well... I should - I should probably go."

No! I hate being alone in this room!

I felt something being pressed to my forehead. It felt a lot like....

Awww. Picies just kissed my forehead.

But then I didn't hear anything else. Did that mean he was gone? Or was he just being really quiet? I sighed in my head. This is boring. And painful.

Then I felt that someone was curling up to me on my right side. Pan was the only person that ever did that, so I could only hope it was him.

"Hey, Kasey." British. Definitely Pan. "I'm pretty sure I just got yelled at by a fairy." He chuckled, and it made me smile. "I was sitting on my coffin, examining my handsome self," - we all know that's not what he was thinking about - "and she came and chewed me out. Saying I should believe."

That would help my self confidence greatly.

"But I don't know what to believe in. In you? In your strength? Your will? That you'll pull through this? What do I believe in, Kasey?"

I wanted to slap him. Everything, you idiot!

"I don't know. I wish you could help me."

I'm trying to, dumbass!

He sighed. "I'm not going to give up on you. I promise."

I made a mental note to call him an asshole and punch him in the crotch. You are so stupid. But I was glad when I heard Pan's breathing even out. He was asleep with me. He slept with me every night. It made my heart melt in my chest.

I wished he could have helped me. I wished he could have stolen me away from this pain. Taken me to a safer dream.

Taken me back to Neverland.