[The scene opens on Periscope and Pipette in Periscope and Dice's kitchen, as seen in installment 1.05.]
Periscope: I don't think I want to.
Pipette: Oh come one, trust me, everything will be great!
Periscope: I really don't want to, Pipe, and I don't think I can anyways. I'm too anxious of a person to do that. I don't even think Aglet likes me very much as a friend. I think I'm just not gonna do it.
Pipette: Oh, come on. Don't be stupid.
Periscope: It's too late. I am stupid. It can't be helped. But actually, I think me deciding not to is the smart decision. I don't want my life to be about that.
Pipette: You don't have anything better to do.
Periscope: Maybe you're right, but romance isn't just a thing to do. I'm not you and Dice.
Pipette: What do you mean?
Periscope: Oh, is that not a thing? I thought that was a thing. I thought "stealing something" was just code that you two were going to go make out or something like that.
Pipette: What? No! I don't even- Why would you even assume that?
Periscope: I don't know, it would be kind of cute if you were, and if you are, I don't really care or anything.
Pipette, clearly flustered: That's so ridiculous. I can't believe you would even say something like that, Peri.
[The door opens.]
Dice: Hey Peri, I'm home.
[Dice walks into the kitchen.]
Dice: Oh, hey Pipe. Did you bring in our mail?
Pipette: Uh, no, I got here before the mail came.
Dice: I don't feel like walking to get it, so just check our box when you leave and bring it back whenever, ok?
Pipette: That makes absolutely no sense, but sure.
Dice: Anyways, to business.
Periscope: What business? We don't do anything.
Dice, pointing at Periscope: You, my friend, have to avoid Aglet for a little bit.
Pipette: Hang on, that's irrational, we were just planning something about Aglet.
Periscope: Shut up, don't tell Dice what you were planning! And don't tell them that I'm involved! I want nothing to do with that!
Pipette: That's just because you won't listen to what I'm saying!
Dice: Hey, I'd really like to explain what I mean, if that's cool with everyone.
Pipette: Why do I have to avoid Aglet? I thought we liked Aglet.
Dice: Do you remember when they came in with the census people?
Pipette: Yeah, so?
Dice: Did you ever think about why they didn't leave with the census people?
Pipette: No... But I still don't understand what you mean.
[Dice pulls up a stool, sits in it, and grabs one of the cookies.]
Dice, before taking a bite of the cookie: Aglet wasn't allowed to leave with the census people on the case of the mysterious figure known as Meredith Simmons.
[Everyone is visibly uncomfortable for a silent moment.]
Dice: I know. I just found out. So, just for a few days, Aglet can't think about the census. So, Aglet can't see me, because we just talked about it, and Peri is involved, so Peri, you can't see them for a bit either. Just to allow for some kind of cool-off.
Pipette: Well that sucks.
Dice: Wait, why? Explain that plan you had to me.
Periscope: I really think that's not necessary.
Pipette: Well, I had just thought that since Peri has such a huge crush on Aglet, that they should ask them out, you know?
Dice: YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON AGLET?
Pipette: D, are you actually blind?
Periscope: Oh, well at least the other part is starting to make sense.
Pipette: What other part?
Periscope, musing: Oh, no other part. Don't worry about it.
Dice: How come I wasn't the first person to know about this?
Pipette: Because since you abandoned me for Aglet, Periscope and I are now best friends.
Dice: What?! I go to the edge with Aglet for one day, and I come back to this?
Pipette: See, but my goal, then, here, is to get Peri to go to the edge with Aglet instead.
Periscope: Buttered biscuits, why are you like this?
Dice: I don't get it...
Periscope: You're going to corrupt Dice's mind, Pipe. Is this why you-
Pipette: Shut up! Periscope! Let it go! We're focusing on you right now!
Periscope: I don't like this. I don't like being stuck in this conversation loop with no way out.
Dice: I'm still really confused...
Periscope: Ok, you know what? New system.
[The three are still in the kitchen.]
Periscope: Alright. So, you can only talk if you have the stick, and you can't take the stick by force. I thought of the stick, so I get to talk first.
There's a silence because Periscope is the one with the stick.
Periscope: Great. So, yeah, sure, I maybe like Aglet a little bit, but I'd really rather not have a romantic relationship any time in the near future.
[Pipette raises their hand. Periscope passes Pipette the stick.]
Pipette: What about other types of relationships?
[Periscope and Dice both raise their hands.]
Pipette: No, you gave me the stick. It's time for both of you to listen silently to my monologue. You chose this.
[credits]

YOU ARE READING
Work In Progress
General FictionThis is in a web series format that I can't exactly produce because I don't have locations or actors. All characters are not gender-specific. Feel free to approach me with comments or if you want to produce your own episodes of this thing (chronolog...