Work In Progress

1.01: Pilot (Groceries)

[Two people, Dice and Periscope, sit at a table drinking coffee.]

Dice: This stuff is weak.

Periscope: I know. I'll buy a different brand next time.

Dice: There are no other brands, you know as well as I do.

Periscope: Well, then, why did you complain about the coffee?

Dice: I don't know, just... trying to make conversation, just let it go.

Periscope, after a moment of silence: So what are we up to today?

Dice: I don't know, wanna chase down a bounty hunter?

Periscope: Be serious, real life isn't Star Wars.

Dice: ...We could find someone new to buy coffee from.

Periscope: There is no one else to buy coffee or anything else from; we live in the middle of nowhere. There's just the same old guy who pops by every week.

Dice: Yeah, yeah.

Periscope, after a moment of silence: So... do you know any place we could make some money?

Dice: Nope.

[Periscope gives out a huffy breath, and seconds later, there's a knock on the door. Periscope quickly puts their finger on their nose.]

Periscope: Nosies.

Dice, after a sigh: Fine. I'll get the door.

[Dice goes to answer the door.]

Dice, vaguely heard in the background: Yo.

Pipette, vaguely heard in the background: Sup.

[Dice comes back with Pipette, who is carrying a stack of envelopes.]

Pipette: Periscope.

Periscope: Hey, Pipette. What's up?

Pipette: A lot, according to your mail. Do you guys read this stuff? It's like a soap opera. I love it.

[Pipette pulls up a stool, as there are no other chairs at the table.]

Dice: Please don't read our mail.

Pipette: You know, neither of you are any fun.

Dice: So do something about it.

Periscope: Yeah, bring some fun into our lives.

Pipette: Ok, well, there's a certain son-of-a-gun who needs roughing up, we could-

Dice: We're not fighting Aglet, not again. We like Aglet. Aglet sends us assorted sausages every month.

Pipette: Would making a pun here be harsh?

Periscope: I already get the picture.

Dice: I don't, what's the joke?

Periscope: Don't explain the joke.

Pipette: Ok, well, if you don't want to fight someone, what do you want to do?

Dice: I want a good cup of coffee.

Pipette: Ok, let's go. Let's do it. Let's go find decent coffee.

Periscope: I don't like leaving the house, why are we doing anything?

Pipette: Aw, come on. Don't be like that. Let's go, this'll be a blast.

Pipette heads for the door.

Dice: Hey. Caffeine is caffeine.

Periscope, after making an overly drawn out choking sound in the back of their throat, gives out a very drawn out: Fine.