Everything Seventeen

Seungcheol (S.coups)

The doorbell rang and my mother went to check who was at the door. She came into my room.

"Honey, it's him again," she told me.

For 2 weeks in a row, Seungcheol had been calling me and showing up at my door but I refused to talk to or see him.

We had gotten into a big fight and I ended our relationship right there. At first, he was alright with it and never talked to me ever again but only 2 days later, he came running back to me. I ignored him, not wanting to hear a word of what he had to say.

For the umpteenth time, my mother begged me to answer the door and talk to him.

"Nah, he'll get tired and give up soon," I assured her.

"But he's been at it for 2 weeks. Have pity on him. A man doesn't put down his ego for a woman so easily. At least hear what he has to say," she persuaded me.

I thought through my decision. Well, I guess my mother did have a point. Although I wanted to be firm, I also had to be fair. I guess just this once then after properly hearing him out, I can end our relationship more fairly.

When I got near enough to the front door, I heard a few voices. I planted my ear to the door to hear what was going on outside.

"Seungcheol, please. If she didn't answer the past 2 weeks, what more now," Jeonghan's voice was clear.

"Hyung, please. Focus on your job as an idol first. You can try again some other time. She is just 1 girl who may not be waiting for you but there are many fans who definitely are. We can't give these fans quality performances if you're acting like this," a younger voice begged him.

"No. I must see her. I must let her know how I feel. I'm going to keep trying because I love her. Carat! Open the door! I just want to see you!" Seungcheol raised his voice, knocking on the door.

In the midst of his consistent knocking, I unlocked the door. I slowly opened it. I saw Jeonghan and Dino pulling Seungcheol away and failing. They let go the moment they saw me.

Seungcheol looked pretty depressed. His hair was messy and he had eye bags. He probably skipped some workout sessions and meals looking at his thinner figure. He held a small bouquet of roses in his hand. I wonder how many he had bought so far for every time he visited but failed.

Nonetheless, I could not give in just because he looked like a mess and in need of me back in his life. He came up, intending to hug me but I pushed him away gently.

"Look, I'll hear what you have to say but there is no guarantee I'll take you back," I told him strictly.

He nodded with a miserable look on his face.

"I am so so sorry I released my stress from work on you. I shouldn't have hit you that day. It was a mistake. I had no reason for my actions. I love you so much. I regret what I did. I regret hurting you. I promise I will never lash out at you like that ever again. Really. I want you back in my life. I miss you," he cried out.

"What if you do it again?" I asked.

"I won't. I'll find other ways of relieving my stress more effectively so you won't be a victim again. Trust me," he explained.

There was something about him that pulled at my heartstrings. I was so strongly against accepting him back just now but now that he was right here, I was starting to lean the other way. Perhaps it was the sincere loving look in his eyes or his miserable figure that had been starved of my love and attention.

I looked behind to my mother who sat at the dining table, watching me. She could not help me now. 

I turned back to Seungcheol whose eyes never left me. 2 weeks was pretty long. That was 14 days. You could do a lot in 14 days but he chose to take time out of all those 14 days to try to get me back instead of something productive or resting. I felt a tinge of guilt that grew bigger each time I looked at him.

My brain told me to not give in and reject him but my heart told me to forgive him and accept him. My brain told me he would do it again but my heart told me that mistakes happen and if I really did love him, I would give him another chance. The brain is bigger than the heart but the heart is what keeps the body warm and alive. The question remaining at that time was "Do I still love him?".

Well...

I still did.

Instead of words, I went up to him and hugged him. I missed him so much but I could not overlook what he did to me which led me to avoid him. Now that I think of it, I would risk a second chance. All because I still loved him.

"I'll forgive you for it but please promise you won't do that again. I love you so much," I said to him.

"I promise I won't ever hit you or let my stress out on you. I will cherish you for the rest of my life. I love you too," he cried.

He hugged me back. He let go of me and cupped my cheeks.

"So, you'll take me back as your boyfriend?" he asked to confirm.

"Of course," I answered.

And with that, he kissed me. I missed the feeling of his lips on mine; the butterflies in my stomach that fluttered wildly; and my heart beating rapidly. Seungcheol always has his way of making me weak for him. It was frustrating but I was not complaining either. Aish, I love him too much...