A Beautiful Piece Of Broken Pottery

Chapter 4:

One year later

Lucas and I have become the it couple of school. Everyone wanted to be us. It was nearing our anniversary soon and I had the perfect present for him. I wonder what he would get me? My brother and Lucas have been getting along like butter on bread, which to me has been a great advantage. We have been hanging out together a lot and I have been getting very much closer to him as the days and months went by. I was really falling for him and I felt ready to tell him that.

Our anniversary was in 2 days and I was planning to tell him I loved at the end of our night. Today I was planning on going shopping with Josh surprisingly enough he was a really good person to go shopping with because he is brutally honest and not afraid to voice his opinion. I was in need of a new dress for Friday night . Lucas said he had a surprise for me but we were going to a fancy restaurant first. I ran down the stairs and met my brother at his car, hes my driver as well today. I jumped into his car, got my feet onto the dashboard and blasted the volume on his radio. He gave me the most annoyed look and said: "Get your feet off my baby, this is a merc not a cheap line golf shorty." Did I listen? No. Did I care? No. Did it stop me. Obviously not. I just starting singing awfully louder and more high pitched. It was funny because it was a slow Ed Sheeran song. I think its called perfect.

As we arrived at the mall I had began to feel a lot more anxious, my anxiety was sky rocketing right now. I had to find a dress that would make Lucas know why he choose me as a girlfriend and hopefully tell me he loves me tonight too. Boy was I in for the biggest surprise of my life tonight. I was not a person to love shopping, the idea of walking to a hundred shops, looking through a million clothes and trying on a thousand whilst my feet ache to just sot down was not an idea that tickled my fancy. This time I had to hold back the vomit, swallow my pride and suck it up, for I was on a mission and I needed to get it complete. As I was dragging myself into the shops, really not wanting to do this, brother bear was already on the job and picking out some pretty good dresses.

He filled my hands with over 10 different dresses and pushed !e towards the dressing room, people would think my brother was more like my gay best friend rather than my bigger brother. The first one that I had tried on was an olive green ,knee length dress with a pink belt going around the waist. I've seen some ugly things in my life ,but this this dress tops everything on that list. I ran back into the dressing room ready to take it off and try on another dress. The second one that I tried on was a sequence top, poofy red cocktail dress and as soon as I put it on I knew it was the one, I didn't even want to try any of the other dresses that were left, I felt beautiful and radiant, I felt like a woman. I ran out and modeled my way across the store. I knew that Lucas was going to love it and I knew that Lucas was going to love me.

After two sleepless and anxious nights the day the day had finally arrived. I was so excited. I spent the entire day getting ready, from taking a long bubble bath, to washing my hair, I did the works to make sure that I looked my absolute best. Little did I know I was wasting my time, for my night was about to take the spookiest and most heart wrenching turns I have ever had since the dreaded funeral day. I set my hair until it was pin straight , put on some makeup, but not too much. I didn't want to shed a layer of myself in case it rained tonight. I got my dress on and my red heels , put on some sticking red lipstick and I was ready to show my guy what he has and what he needs to appreciate.

Josh was my driver tonight because he wanted to make sure I got to where I was safely, so he could watch over us and so that I would make it back home safely as well. As I walked down the stairs Joshy gave me the biggest bear hugs and said "I am really proud of you shorty, you've grown up to be quiet a lovely young lady and you definitely take after grandma" I began to tear at that statement but had to fan away the tears in order to not mess up my eye makeup. We drove to the fanciest restaurant in town called oceans wonders. It was a really posh seafood restaurant. I jumped out of the car after giving my brother one more hug and began to walk inside and as I lifted my head up there and then my first pang to the heart arrived.

I saw Lucas sitting and having wine with Pheobe our schools most prime and proper student and by far the most smartest girls I have ever met and not to mention she had killer natural beauty I walked over to them without trying to jump to conclusions just yet. "Hi Lucas" I said hoping he would notice the effort I made to look good for him. Instead he began to laugh right at my face , turn to Phoebe and began speaking , he began speaking words that would reside in my mind for years to come, he began to speak words that would affect my life I'm ways no one knew how ,he began to speak words that would change my life for the worst. "Look at this foul, thinking she looks so beautiful when she looks like she just tried so hard. She tried so hard to impress me for what? It wasnt like I would take notice of her anyway. Doesn't she realize that I was just using her. I got what I wanted and now I'm done with her."

I looked at him whilst holding the tears back and asked "what do you mean Lucas?"  " What do I mean? What do I mean? Doesn't it get through your thick skull? I never liked you, I never wanted you. I never will want you. No one will want you. You're so broken and pathetic. You think you're the only one with problems in the world. Sad and broken that's all I hear from you. I can cure a drought with all the tears you've shed. Yes she's dead but so what everyone dies , you're not the only one that lost someone so stop acting so depressed and pathetic its not a good look on you. Who am I kidding? nothing ever looks good on you. Pathetic, waste of time and ugly not to mention fat. I can crack a watermelon with those thighs. Do you have anything to say to me?" He finished and by the time he did I was in full on tears, my heart was cracked open and spilling out its contents , taking me back to that deep dark empty feeling I felt the day she left us. I looked up at him, pushed back some tears, swollowed​ the sob and said "I love you" and I turned around and ran , ran so fast with tears blinding my eyes I hadn't seen a truck coming my way and  all I knew that happened last was my brother screaming Gemma, falling, falling forever and then it all went black...