Justification | Deetranada AU

intoxicate

A/N: This chapter includes illicit drug use and underage drinking. Bee doesn't encourage this behavior. Be safe hoes.

New Year's Eve

(Don POV)

**

 'I want to,' Dee begins softly. 'But I know him, it's probably some big thing to try and show how much he so-called love and miss me instead of tellin' me.'

She shakes her head, continuing, 'He just wanna change my mind. And I'm not goin' out like that.' 'What do you mean?' Don questions carefully, his face slowly turning to stone as he anticipates her response.

She hesitates, biting her lip before looking away, her hands clasping each other. 'I don't know what's gon' happen,' she murmurs. 'But I know he wanna get back with me.' His face hardens as he feels himself fill with questions that he doesn't want the answer to.

'It's not like I'm tryna get back with him for real,' she explains, thumbing her jeans. 'I just...don't know.' She looks up at him, her eyes worried as his face remains expressionless.

'I don't wanna say yeah and it don't or no and it do,' she continues. He nods, hoping that his face hides the bubbling confusion, dread and overwhelming sadness coming over him. He knows that it could happen, that just as easily as she seemed to get over him, she could fall back in love with him.

He knows that she's grown, she's changed, but who's to say he hasn't either? As she continues explaining her refusal to open Nova's gift, all he can think about is the impending future, an end in sight, one that he had hoped wouldn't come.

**

Don sighs, shaking his head of the memory. And while it works for a moment, the pit remains in the bottom of his stomach, every growing, knowing, sensing that just as before, his chance is nonexistent, his default to friendship becoming more and more permanent.

'Vinny!' Dezzie cries out as she runs into his room, a broken toy in hand. 'Daisy pull and now she keep crying,' she exclaims, her loud voice overpowering the shrill screams of her toy. 'Let me see, Dezzie,' he softly coos, taking the doll from her hand.

He attempts to press buttons to cancel out the screaming but each one refuses to work. 'Get me the blue box,' he sighs, turning the doll over. Dezzie shakes her head, tears beginning to wet her face. 'No!' she yells. 'I don't wanna see Penny die!'

'She won't Dezzie,' he reassures, standing to get his toolbox himself. 'I'm just putting her to sleep until I can fix it, okay?' Dezzie buries her face in her hands and he sighs, putting both down in favor of her.

He softly rubs her back as she cries, rocking her gently. 'I promise I'll fix her tomorrow, okay?' he whispers. She nods, sniffling loudly and beginning to wipe her tears. 'Don't tell Diamond?' she questions, a panicked look on her face. He can't' help but smile as he shakes his head, 'I won't.'

He tears dry as she smiles and hugs his neck tightly, 'Love you Vinny!' 'Love you too, Dezzie,' he replies, holding her tight. He gently puts her down and she rushes out of the room, avoiding the routine "death" of another toy. He quickly silences it and places it on his desk.

He steps to his mirror, double checking his attire, taking a deep breath. But her voice fills his mind and he freezes, looking down at his feet. "I just...I don't know," she repeats again and again and again.