Justification | Deetranada AU

finale

For a week or so, Dee and Nova attempt a friendship. They talk occasionally, they hang out once or twice but it's never the same as it used to be. It typically ends in Nova trying to make a move or plead his case for another chance and Dee isn't for it. After talking to Jae about it, she decides to give their friendship some space, allowing them to finish figuring themselves out as individuals. 

This doesn't go over well with Nova who reacts in his newfound fashion of drugs, alcohol and women. Marissa and random girls are his targets until he sees something he hoped to never see, Dee with someone else. Her friendship with Don is still friendship but definitely something more as he witnesses them out on what he presumes to be a date. 

Nova rages, refusing to believe she's given up on them while also becoming vengeful and drowning himself in liquor and music. He stumbles across their track, Ride or Die and calls up Nia to record a verse and re-record the chorus without Dee. 

Dee manages to forgive Nova for his attempts, knowing there is a chance for friendship despite her gut and family telling her otherwise. So she agrees to hang out again, not knowing that this would be their last. On the way, she finds out about Ride or Die and confronts him, demanding to know why something so close to them was remade with Nia of all people. 

But Nova, in his usual nonsober state, laughs, seed it as a joke and doesn't care about her feelings. Not when Don dropped her off, not when he knew she was playing both sides. They argue intensely, throwing around insults to burn the other and take the pain off themselves but it only makes it worse. The intensity, the passion, the emotions, all a horrible recipe for the one thing they both knew shouldn't happen, a kiss. 

Dee loses herself, crying silently as they share what has to be their last moment, needs to be their last. She forces herself out of it, pushing him away, demanding that he never speaks to her again, that they never have a chance to do this ever again. It isn't worth it. He wants to protest but it's pointless; the one person he never wanted to hurt, he did, multiple times, and he was willing to do it again out of spite and jealousy. He had to let go.

For Nova, this is worse than the breakup, his perception skewed finally to reality and his heart breaking daily for the love he can never have again. If he spiraled before, it was only the beginning. He finds himself using drugs and alcohol to cope daily, drowning himself in music and attempting to numb the pain. And it works, at least for his music. It comes in waves, pumped out in highs and lows with more highs than lows. He's recognized for his relatability to heartbreak and his crooning vocals that make girls swoon. He gets called to do the performance of a lifetime, opening for a tour. 

Performances are sold out, girls are screaming his name, begging for pictures and a few tossed bras make him feel real good. But halfway through, his coping catches up to him. He can't remember his songs, he gives the worst performance of a lifetime and in his drug fueled stupor, he has a breakdown on stage, being ushered off in front of a stunned crowd. His slot on the tour is given to someone else, he's forced into rehab by his mother and Ecko and his career is halted with his poor reputation.

For Dee, this is reopening the wound she thought she was so close to healing. They were right, everyone was right; about her, about him, about them. To hear her mother's "I told you so" cuts her deep and for once, she lashes out, choosing to get away as fast as she can. She goes to Latto's house, knowing her mother won't think to search there and tries to deal with the hurt. It's days before she re-enters her own home, her mother's threatening words there but she chooses to ignore them. It's enough to know that at least one person didn't blame her for what happened, Don. 

She confesses to him about Arkansas and the past few weeks, surprised when he doesn't express anger or frustration and instead understanding their history and knowing it wouldn't be easy for it to stop. He tells her that he's willing to try one day if she's ever ready and she agrees to do the same, knowing right now isn't the time. But he chooses to remain there for her, being a friend, a confidant, a stand-in when others can't or choose not to be.

Dee finally works on her mixtape, using her spring break as a time of reflection and creative expression. She finds herself wanting to know more, wanting to ask more questions. But she doesn't. She does, however, open her Christmas gift from Nova. The note is a standard, "I love you so much babygirl" note but the gift was unexpected. It's a chain with their initials and birthstones on it. Very obviously expensive, she finds it hard to believe he was willing to give her something like this. But it was classic Nova, choosing something similar to him than something just for her in an attempt to spoil and buy her. At least... that's what it felt like. She put it into a song, hoping it is the end of those feelings.

Outside of them, JI finds himself comforting Jae more, giving her a safe place to call her own. While they aren't together, their ages a bit too distanced for her mother's liking, they are close and remain so.

Latto starts to make it big in Atlanta, inviting Dee and Jae to a big show of hers down there. They have a great time supporting her, making connections and having fun. It's a nice break for both of them and for Dee, it makes her crave being in that atmosphere more often.

Don struggles with his mother's service overseas and his father's constant hours, missing out on a lot of his summer prep. But Dee steps in, helping watch the girls and giving him time to fill out applications, catch up on projects and make the best of his sophomore year.

Key recovers from his heartbreak, using his music as an outlet and focusing on life to come after graduation. He isn't as excited anymore but with his friends help, he finds his passion again and manages to get numerous opportunities coming his way for the summer, including a summer tour headlining with other up and coming artists

When graduation rolls around, Dee and Nova have gotten better,m mentally and emotionally. Nova has finished rehab, managed to pass his final exams and is ready to graduate. He feels like a better person, a better man, one ready to overcome obstacles and own up to his mistakes. He has a persistent urge to contact Dee but his therapist tells him not to, it isn't time and she'll come when she's ready. It doesn't stop him from craving but he doesn't act on it.

Dee finalizes her mixtape and releases it, getting great feedback and critiques from her peers and moguls alike. She takes that energy with her to release more, engage more and prepare for her summer of hard work. She plans to attend graduation to see Key and JI, knowing Nova will be there and unsure if she should say anything. She has so much to say but she knows her words won't come out so with Don's urging, she chooses to write them down, get them out and decide the rest later.

At graduation, it's a joyous celebration for them all. The energy is high and Dee feels confident that though it may not be the best time for Nova, it was the best time for her to end this, for good. She gives the letter to him along with sincere congratulations and wishes for a prosperous future. He accepts it and tries to resists reading as long as he can but when he does, it tears him apart. To have her pain verbalized, to see the consequences of his actions and understand what it meant to hurt her, truly, is a hit he wasn't ready for. But he needed it. He needed to understand, to know, to feel her pain to truly empathize and grow. So despite the tears and hurt that came from the pieces of paper, he knew it was justified.

For Dee, the relief was there. She finally felt free, she finally knew that her feelings were put out and whether they were acknowledged or no had nothing to do with her. She did the right thing, she took her power back and she finally felt justified in moving on.

*

Thanks for rocking with me guys! I know this took FOREVER and you didn't get the full chapters you deserved BUT things happen and I didn't want to leave you guys hanging. I hope you enjoyed and if not, that's okay too. I enjoyed this journey, thanks for sticking with me from Sensi to Justi. I hope one day we can return with the final of the trilogy but only time can tell. 

Keep reading lovelies and thanks so much!

-Bee