Summer Snow ~First Love~ (DROPPED)

Confession Day

It was the day I planned to confess, but I was seized by anxiety.

Our "Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence" was a success that year as well. I didn't have regrets. I was able to defeat the loneliness of not being able to adapt in my class by joining this club. Of course Rosalinda played a big role in it.

To tell her my gratitude and my feelings for her during those three years, the day after the party I waited Rosalinda at her station after school. I sent her a message saying I was waiting for her. But she didn't reply. Maybe.. no, she most probably wouldn't have come.

As the sun went down, the station became deserted. San Diego's Station was always crowded, but Rosalinda's station was quite small ad desolated. My house was considerably in the countryside, but hers as well. Rosalinda was born and raised in this small area.

That was probably the first and last time I'd stand at her station.

Rosalinda walked back and forth in front of this station. I imagined what she could possibly think while walking here.

Maybe her ex-boyfriend? Maybe the grades of the tests? Or maybe her problems playing her instrument...?

I thought about different topics but.. I realized I didn't know much about Rosalinda even if we practiced together for three years.

"William.. You never seriously face me." I thought about her words.

I might have avoided her, when she tried to seriously confront me.

Embarrassing...

I was afraid of destroying our relationship. If she rejected me it'd be a problem.. I decided everything by my own. Maybe Rosalinda tried to shorten the distance between us even if she didn't have romantic feelings for me.

There wasn't any time left.

If I passed the exam, we wouldn't see each other anymore. And we would still be like that until graduation.

Not meeting ever again...

The memories of those three years crossed my mind and I couldn't stop them. Even if I knew she wouldn't come, I kept waiting Rosalinda in the freezing cold. I endured the coldness, thinking about Rosalinda and willing to do so until dawn.

The last train was gone. Knowing my family would worry, I lied to them saying I would sleep over at a friend's house. Rosalinda was already at home and probably preparing to go to sleep. My phone didn't receive any messages.

I was rejected before even confessing...

I only had myself to blame, as it was all because of my own cowardice. I just wanted to tell her one thing.

Thank you for allowing me to find my dream. I always loved you...

We were close to each other for three years. I liked her this much, yet... I had only one thing to say, why couldn't I do it?

A snow crystal fell on my hand.

Snow in December.

It didn't seem it was going to snow this year. San Diego is an area with heavy snowfalls, but it wouldn't accumulate during December in the city. My area, being near the sea, didn't see snow until after the New Year. Yet, that snow falling silently felt appropriate for Christmas.

It wasn't nor the 24th nor the 25th, but to me that day was Christmas. The day I planned to confess to my beloved first love.

"William..." I doubted my ears.