Masked Facade

Chapter 10: Need or Want?

Ryan's POV

My hand twitched to hold her while my eyes burned like fire at the mere thought of what she did to me. She taught me that women were never to be trusted. Well, at least women like her. She left me hanging in the middle of nowhere. Literally nowhere. Everyone around me warned me that she wasn't the person she seemed to be. That her pretentious self and her skills would bring me down the dirty lane from where it'd be damn difficult to give my life a second chance.

Heat pooled under my skin as my hands fisted on either side of my body. Even while giving me a stinging look, she looked beautiful. If anything, more pretty than the last time I saw her. Her white blouse hugged her body at every right place, showing off her swift curves along her waist and down to her hip. The pencil skirt hid everything down her slim waist as it fell just above her knees, giving a great view of her slender legs. With her six-inch heels, she still stood below my height and it felt as if I can dominate my presence over hers.

Her face was flush with the warmth of embarrassment when I caught her stormy blue eyes raking my body. Her eyes were pools of iridescent blue, sculpted upon her creamy face like dazzling jewels. Her long hazel tresses were pulled up into a high ponytail with few strands tugged behind her ear. Standing with steeled shoulders and straightened back, she spoke of horror and peace, turmoil and joy, all at once. With cherry lips glistening with sweat, she truly was a beautiful sight to behold.

A part of me wanted to ask her every question that I have been meaning to ask her if I ever get to see her and there was this part, which struggled between having and forgiving her at the same time.

When I confronted her yesterday, she ran away. Just like old times. Just like a coward, I remembered her to be. And I knew that she'd come back to me. Not because she had to explain herself for her grave mistakes but for her godforsaken job. Yeah, I got that from Jack, my assistant, a father-like figure, a friend... He was all those things to me when I was all alone, while he stuck by my side, emphasizing his importance in every way possible.

"Don't you have the decency to at least knock before entering my room?" I didn't even think about hiding my rage from her as I spoke to her.

"I... I, uh..." Her stammered words fed my ego and fury as she searched for right words to say. Casting her gaze towards the tiled floor which was slate, but not grey, and it was all blacks and browns in a chaotic tumble of wonderfulness, she breathed out frantically.

When she didn't put any effort to speak up, cocking my head, I peered over to her and said, "Are you tongue-tied because you couldn't handle your gawking or are you ashamed to face me, after all these years?"

At that she looked up into my eyes. Those storm blue eyes. I could see the guard coming up in them. The same shield she used to have back then to protect herself. But now whom she was trying to guard?

I arched an eyebrow at her when she still didn't answer me. And then I asked her something that I knew would twist her in pain. I knew it would hurt her but did I care?

"Or is it because Carol replaced you after my mom?"

She flinched at that and started worrying her lips. It was an attempt of hers to stop her tears from making its presence visible. Same old habits. And when I glared at her, I felt the wheels turning around in her head.

I knew that comparing her to Carol was a big blow to her guts and to the ego that she fed so proudly. She had it coming and I didn't want to let her go so easily. Because she knew that if there was any woman to whom I did give a damn was my mom.

When I saw her yesterday, the bloody wall that I had built around myself to keep all hateful people away from me, came crumbling down to my feet. Actually to her feet. And I felt like an absolute crap bag for letting her have so much control over me than Carol. Because unlike her, Carol treasured me. When I first met her, she didn't ask for anything from me than my silence. When I was on the edge, she let me take my frustrations out on her. And after my several episodes, she'd just give her shoulder for me to lean on. She then became everything to me and Alice nothing.