I Am Not Your Master; I Am Your Partner: A (Neko) Dan and (Human) Phil Series

Promises He Can Keep

Dan woke, sweaty and panicked. Phil was quick to respond.

"Dan? Sweetheart?" Phil whipped around to hold his shaking baby. Dan gripped his shoulders tightly and struggled to regulate his breathing.

It had been months since Dan had a nightmare outside of heat. Phil was always ready to soothe him, though it never failed to upset him. It hurt him to see his husband this way; it reminded him of the early days in which Dan would wake almost nightly, crying out in fear.

"Shhhh, I'm here. You're safe Baby." Phil held him tightly, speaking into his damp hair. He could feel Dan's sweaty chest against his own, his arms wrapped tightly around his waist, almost painfully so.

"Daddy." Dan sobbed into his bare chest. His body trembled. Phil pressed his lips to Dan's forehead to check for fever.

"I've got you Love." Phil pulled the sheet upward and used a corner to wipe Dan's face and brow.

He relaxed a bit, softening into Phil's arms. "They took him from us Phil...help me get him home..." Dan was not fully recovered. He was trying to describe the nightmare to Phil, but he spoke in a way that indicated that he was still inside of it.

"It's a nightmare Baby. Shhhh, he is safe." Phil felt sick to his stomach. He almost promised Dan that no one would take their son away, but he held back when he realized, for the first time, that he couldn't make such a promise.

It took almost a full hour to help Dan get back to sleep. Phil lay awake next to him, softly stroking his tail.

He looked at his sleeping baby, his hands clasped together under his chin, and wondered if parenthood would being such nightmares of loss and fear.

Did a parent ever stop worrying about the safety of his or her child? There would be illness, disappointments, and losses to face as a family, but what about the "what ifs?"

Phil felt the same need to protect their son that he did Dan. He would never stop fighting for Neko rights and pushing for progress to continue. Their son would never know the fear of the trade or the despair of a life committed to service.

Phil realized, as his husband sighed softly into his bare shoulder, that there were some promises that he couldn't make. He could not promise Dan that their son would always be safe, but he could promise to protect him at all costs and to give his life trying.

Phil started to cry. The silvery moonlight filtered in through the transom, casting a ghostly glow on Dan's skin. It hurt to love someone so much. He would give his life for his husband and his child, and he knew that Dan would do the very same.

* * *

It was rare that London see this much snow. Dan stood at the window, his silky tail swinging with anticipation. Phil smiled when he saw him standing there, ready to play and pounce.

"Snow!" Dan tugged at Phil's sleeve, playfully dragging him to the window. "Look Phil! Look!"

Phil was still wearing his glasses, his hair still tousled from sleep. He yawned, though he couldn't keep himself from laughing through it.

"My sweet Kitten." Phil rubbed his little ears. "So eager and excited...you are so precious Sweetheart."

Dan smiled and nodded enthusiastically. Phil thought it was cute to see him this way. He pictured little Noah, all bundled up with his dad in the snow. He could see Dan chasing him, playing a Yeti, while the boy squealed with delight. "I'm gonna get you my little snow monster!" Dan would wiggle his gloved fingers and scoop him up into a big hug. Phil could see himself inside making hot chocolate for his boys, watching them play through the frosted window. He would give Dan an extra marshmallow for being so amazing with their boy.