Dependency // l.tomlinson *Completed*

41. Louis

41. Louis

I stirred in my sleep, hearing whimpers coming from beside me, under the covers. She breathed out heavily and that was when I realized that Radley was crying. She was breaking down right next to me in my bed.

I craned my neck to look at the digital clock sitting on my night table.

5:47 AM.

I turned onto my side so that I could face her and leaned closer so I could kiss her forehead.

"What's wrong, baby? Why are you crying?" I whispered.

"Crap. Sorry for waking you, Lou. Go back to sleep." She sniffed and put her arm around my waist.

"How can I fall back asleep if the love of my life is crying?"

"It's nothing. I promise."

"Radley, honey, I'm awake now. You can tell me. What happened? Was it what Liam said a few hours ago?" I gently grazed my nails up and down her lower back, calming her down.

"No, not him. I didn't really mind what he said. He was just stressed." Radley shook her head.

"You know how much it hurts me to see you cry right?"

She nodded, "Yeah, I'm sorry."

"Do wanna go out and get some fresh air with me? It'll help you clear your mind and you can tell me what's bothering you." I suggested.

She nodded and slowly made her way off my bed. Radley was wearing my t-shirt and a pair of my boxers- as was I, since the weather was getting warmer- and we made our way towards the yard.

There was a stone bench facing the fountain we had so we took a seat. I grabbed a hold of her hand and she rested her head on my shoulder.

The sun was just coming up, which made this crisp morning look and feel extra beautiful. I could hear Radley taking deep breaths, physically letting her stress go.

"So, darling, what's bugging you?" I finally asked.

"I don't really know. A lot of things." She whispered.

"We've got all the time in the world."

"Our babies aren't a mistake, are they? They won't ruin your career and all, will they?"

"What? No! No, no, no! Not at all! I can't believe that even crossed your mind, Radley. Sweetheart, they are not a mistake. They won't ruin my career. Yes, it might be tough for me to leave you alone with the two when we go on tour but you could always come visit. They are living proof of how much we love each other. To be honest, I've never been so happy about anything in my life. I am going to be a dad. You're giving me that opportunity, baby. I can't believe you would think that."

"I don't think they're a mistake. They're the best thing that has happened to me, after you."

I kissed her temples and hummed, "I love you so much. What else is bothering you?"

"It's just the same old," she shrugged, "I just really miss my brother. And- as bizarre as it sounds- I sort of miss my mom, too."

"We could always go see them, love. You just have to say the words."

"But how am I supposed to move on if I visit them all the time, you know? And I'm not allowed to travel. You know what the doctor said."

"Just thinking about them keeps their memory alive. It's okay to miss them, baby, you have the right to. But think of it this way, if you keep wishing they were here and kept yourself sad all the time, do you think they'd be happy? Not really. Your feelings take a toll on the babies and they wouldn't want that. When they're born, you'll be so happy and that's all your brother and mum need. Your happiness."