E: "Okay, Aeryn. So there are some things you need to know and do before you meet my dad."
A: "Sure."
E: "He won't want you to talk much. He believes women are here to look pretty and make life easier. You won't have any issues with the looking pretty bit, but I have a feeling you'll have difficulty holding your tongue."
A: "I-"
E: "He'll probably make misogynistic jokes and he'll expect you to either smile or laugh quietly. God, I feel like such an asshole telling you to do this."
A: "He's the asshole, not you."
E: "Thanks for agreeing to play my, um, my girlfriend for this."
A: "Well, when I offered I didn't expect I'd actually have to meet him."
E: "Yeah, I was hoping neither of us would have to go near him honestly."
A: "Okay, so I'm going to come out of the bathroom now and I need you to tell me whether I look nice enough for your you and your dad. I put on the dress you asked me to wear but I'm not sure it fits properly."
E: "Finally, you've been taking ages to-"
A: "Eli?"
E: "..."
A: "You're staring at me and it's worrying. Does it really look that bad?"
E: "NO! It - you look so...you look really beautiful, Aeryn."
A: "I - um, thank you."
E: "Aww, you're blushing!"
A: "Shut up!"
E: "We should probably hold hands."
A: "What?"
E: "When we see my dad, I mean! Is that okay?"
A: "Yes! I mean, yeah, sure."
E: "Smooth. Okay, he'll be here in a minute so maybe we should start now?"
A: "Yeah, that's fine!"
E: "Your hands are sweaty."
A: "So are yours, Eli."
E: "That backfired."
A: "You're an idiot."
E: "But you love me anyway."
A: "If you say so."