Where Are My Words?

black death

Hello.
Can you notice a difference in my appearance?
Do I look gross?

Does my hair look like a knotted mess?
I haven't brushed it in a few days.
When I shower, I get out and throw it in a hair tie.
It stays like that.
It's still damp two days later when I take it down.
I dont take it down to finally brush it.
I take it down to put it up in a neater bun.

Not that its really much neater than the rat's nest it was.

Do I smell different?
Do I smell like lavender and just like a fresh bouquet of flowers?

You must have caught me on a good day.
It has come to the point where I lay in bed,
instead of doing my self-care routine.
Not that I really had one anyway.
It has come to the point where instead of showering every night,
I push showers back anywhere from two to four days.
Not that this routine hasn't become a norm in the past several weeks.

What does the average teenager smell like?

Body odor, tears, fear?
Sweat, stink breath, anxiety?

Or does the average teenager smell like depression?

You look at this world and everyone is down.
Yeah, that's right, everyone is staring down.
Blinking at the white light in a black or silver rectangle.
Yeah, thats right, everyone is falling down.
Drunk and passed out at parties being touched unwillingly.
Hell yeah, thats right, everyone is getting down.
Shaking their body parts on the dance floor as if they don't have morals.

But when I say everyone is down I'm referring to the mass depression in teens.
It's a trend.
C'mon, mom, everyone is sad!
Dad, please, let me stay in bed!

Getting out of bed has become
too much of a workout,
and let me tell you,
I dont go to the gym, honey.
Waking up has become
even more exhausting than being tired,
and that's the exact opposite of its purpose.
Showering and washing has become
The Bubonic Plague,
when everyone thought the water carried the diseases,
when it was really just the filth.

Maybe that's depression.
A plague where you're too lazy to take care of yourself.
A plague where the more you wallow in your filth the more it piles up.
A blackness darker than that of the skin on the bodies of victims as their flesh began to die.
A void more miserable than the tumors which grew on the bodies of men and women.
We all lay in one spot.
We all can't sleep.
We are all up at night wondering what will become of us.

Some of us die.
All of them died.

The only way to make it go away is to bathe ourselves, not just to be clean,
but with happiness amd bright light.
We must wash away the darkness and let all of our minds leak out of our ears.

We can't let it continue to take us.

Hello.
Can you notice anything different about my appearance?
I actually got up today.