Sweet creature

T H R E E

Sweet creature | Noah

She is suffering, but no one knows that

Because she hides that some place deep

inside. Because the last thing she wants is

Pity.

- JmStorm.

Serenity.

26. That's the number of times I've uttered the words 'I'm fine', and never once today did I truly mean it. Apart of me thought that maybe if I said it enough times, then it would get easier - bearable. But it's done nothing but drive me closer to depression. I was tired - and not the type of tired that could be fixed with a nap, but the kind that could be fixed if I closed myself off from the world, and just drifted into oblivion. Oblivion at this point seemed more inviting than reality. At least if I was gone I wouldn't have to lie to people, I could be at peace - my kind of peace, the peace I know where my sister would be. I could see her face already. I can hear her laugh in my daydream, see her smile. I could tell her how sorry I am for killing her, and how it was all my fault. She would probably tell me that it wasn't, but if I wasn't so selfish she would still be here. Alive and heathy. Probably married because she was obsessed with loving everyone and everything. She was so gentle, so pure. And I ended her short life, not physically - it was an accident. A car crashed into us, a drunk driver I'm sure - I lived, but she wasn't so fortunate. She didn't deserve death, it was my fault - I deserved death, but here I am. Alive, and nothing else. I walk to my last period of the day as exhaustion floods throughout me. It's pouring outside, as predicted from earlier. My black hoodie stays glued to my head as I arrive to Biochemistry. The room is empty, and cold. I was first to arrive, which I've been for all of my classes today - I didn't waste time going from class to class, mostly because I had absolutely nobody to talk to - nor did I feel like talking to anyone. I make my way into the empty classroom, and make it my mission to find a seat in the very back of the classroom. I wanted to be invisible, unseen. I pull up a seat to the boxy lab table, that sat closest to the window. The space was so confined that it could only fit two people per table. I hoped that nobody would come and sit by me, but for some reason things never ended up in my favor. My eyes flicker to the clock above the wall in the classroom. Class doesn't officially start until another ten minutes, so I try to relax and enjoy the short amount of alone time that I now have. I stare blankly out the window that overlooked the student parking lot. The rain was coming down hard, so the parking lot was deserted. Everyone here owned luxury cars - anything ranging from a Jeep Wrangler to a Porsche Panamera - they had it all. Me and my hatchback Volkswagen didn't belong here, but something about not having a luxury car made me feel a little bit better. I was......unique. Rare. It felt good not to be like everybody else.

"Hi" an unfamiliar voice greets me suddenly. The sound of their deep voice brings me shock, causing me to flinch. I was so lost in my own thoughts like always, that I hadn't even realized that someone else has come into the room. The room was still fairly empty, except now it was me and someone else. I check the clock again quickly, and only one minute has past since I've last checked it. Its felt like five, but time always seems to move by faster when you're daydreaming. My brown eyes flick back to the person that owned the voice. It was a boy. He stood about 6'0 with ashy white blonde hair, and ice blue eyes. The blue in his eyes were so mesmerizing- they merely captivate your attention almost instantly. His face was bare, and boyish. He looked like something out of a movie, with his flawless beauty. His style was mundane. Pants, white shirt, letterman jacket, with a basketball stuck to his hand. I recognized his face, seeming as though it was pretty much all over the athletic hall, Yet he was still a stranger to me. In another life I'm sure his appearance would have given me butterflies - I'm sure other girls get butterflies when he's near, but in this life I can't feel anything but the pain from my past.