Me Before You(Camren)

Chapter 16

That night after Dinah had visited I could do nothing but think about everything I missed. I shouldn’t have left and I knew I was selfish the day I left but I was only thinking about what I thought was best for Lauren. Although in actuality I was only thinking of myself not Dinah, Normani, or Lauren. I missed such a precious thing that can happen to anyone. My best friend had her wedding and gotten married to someone that she loved and longed to be with for a long time. I felt horrible that I wasn’t there for her when I knew she needed me to be. Then Lauren got married to someone who wasn’t me and even though that was nobody’s fault but mine it hurt. That’s just me being selfish I knew I couldn’t make Lauren wait for that long. But things happen for a reason because if it didn’t happen this way Lauren wouldn’t have been able to help the people she did including me. I was in a fast recovery getting out soon and I couldn’t have been happier. It’s been 3 months since I got here and I was pretty sure when I was released I had nowhere to go. I wasn’t always stable but when I was I had a place to stay and I know now that it is all gone. My apartment wasn’t far from here but there was no telling if the owner actually kept my things there for all this time.

“Hi Miss Cabello it’s time for dinner. Ally said entering the room setting the tray down on the table beside the bed turning around to leave but I stooped her.

‘I know thinking that I’m using Lauren but it’s not true I honestly love her I have all this time. I said

“Look I’m not here to offend you but you left her how can you love somebody you walked out on? She questioned me.

“It was a hard time for me Ally I was going through so much and it was fair to Lauren but I don’t expect you to understand that. I said bluntly.

“Your right I don’t but I know Lauren she would’ve done anything to help you she let you in her home when you had nowhere to go but you walked out on her when all she know was you. You came into her life and walked back out of it how you expect anyone to understand that. Ally said she had a valid point but she was right.

I sighed. “Your right I was being selfish but I was doing what I thought was best for her. I shrugged putting the tray in my lap.

“Well you obviously don’t know her that well because if you did you’d would’ve know that you were what was best for her. She said walking out as I sat there in shock because everything she had just said was true and I felt it in my heart the pain and hurt the regret all of it.  

Lauren deserved so much better than me and I knew it I’m sure everybody knew it.

The next morning Lauren came delivering my breakfast.

“Hey Camz you okay? She asked looking concerned

“Yeah I’m fine. I said not looking at her my eyes on the food on the tray playing with the eggs with my fork.

“Camz you may have been gone a while but I know when you’re lying. She said smiling slightly. I sighed

“Ally said some things that made since yesterday and I’ve been thinking about it that’s all. I said shrugging and her nostrils flared.

“What did she say to you? Did she say something bad because if she did I’ll go say some words to her right now. She said standing up and I grabbed her arm pulling her back to sit.

“She didn’t say anything bad she just said things that were true.  Lauren I don’t deserve your affection or anything you have to offer because I’m not worthy of you. I left you knowing that it wasn’t right. I didn’t even tell you goodbye. I didn’t say I love you and that was messed up. You lost your mom and I wasn’t even there for you. I was being selfish and I don’t deserve any kind of sympathy from you and I’m sorry. I said sniffling sadly.

‘ Camz you don’t get to tell me what I deserve because if so I wouldn’t have lost my mom I didn’t deserve that no less than I deserve you because I do. Camz you were my first everything and I couldn’t ask for nothing better than you. I was lost without you yes but with time it got better. I’m glad you made that choice to leave because I got to help you heal and that’s more than I can ask for babe. She said running the pad of her thumb across my cheek to stop my tear from falling.

“I love you Lauren more than anything and I’m sorry for everything but I want to start over clean slate can we do that? I asked. She smirked and nodded.

“Yes we can but I have a proposition for you when you get out accompany me on a date and we can talk about everything you feel comfortable with sharing with me. She said holding my hands.

“Yes I would love that but there’s something I have to tell you first. I said putting my head down and she put her fingers on my chin and lifted my head up.

“Okay what is it? She asked

“Lauren when I get out of here I have nowhere to go I have no money and I have nowhere to care for myself no clothes nothing. I said tearing up she looked at me sadly.

“Camz you always have somewhere to go. She said

“No I do—she cut me off.

“Yes you don your coming home with me and I won’t accept no for an answer I’ll get you everything you need Camz because that’s how I am okay? She said.

I just smiled at her and wrapped my arms you’re her waist and she pulled me in and kissed my forehead.  I just smiled into her chest listening to her heartbeat. I was home and her words confirmed it I couldn’t think of a better ending to my morning.

Hey so here’s chapter 16 sorry for not updating sooner school just started back and I’m trying to do good so I can go see Camila when she starts touring after her album comes out on the 12th I hope you’re as excited as I am because I know that this will be an amazing album. But please vote share my book I really hope at the end of this book you’ll like it but thanks for reading

~Anansa